Discover Slang

Early Earthquake Warning

A message from the ground telling you to move your butt before it turns you into a pancake.

'I moved just in time. My neighbor didn’t.', @PancakeMan

'The message was clear: ‘Get out or get smashed.’', @SmashedMom

'I was halfway to the door when the wall hit me.', @WallHitter2025

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Early

A time so early it’s like your body is still in bed and your brain is screaming at you for no reason.

My alarm went off at 4:30 AM. I thought I was dreaming, but I was just drunk.

I woke up at Early Early and immediately texted my mom to tell her I was dead.

He showed up at work at Early Early. His boss thought he was a ghost.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Early

A time so early that it's basically a medical condition caused by too much coffee and not enough respect for your body.

She got up at Early Early just to text her ex. He blocked her. Now she’s mad at coffee.

He had Early Early erections so bad, he woke up his whole neighborhood.

My dog woke me up at Early Early. I threw a shoe. He ran away. I cried.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Drinking

Drinking so early you could start a bar fight before your coffee gets hot

I had a shot of tequila at 8 AM. My date is going to die from the vibes.

I drank two beers before my mom even said good morning. She's not happy.

I started drinking at noon. My brain is now a bar.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Drinking

Getting wasted before you even leave your house because life is too hard

I drank a whole bottle of wine before I got dressed. My pants are now a fashion statement.

I woke up at 9 AM and drank a Monster energy drink. My heart is now a fire alarm.

I drank so much before my date that I forgot my name. My date forgot theirs too.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Drinking

The art of drinking so early you end up in a restaurant at noon because you’re too wasted to remember your own address

I drank so much before my date that I ended up at a pizza place at 11 AM. The waiter was confused.

I got so wasted before my date that I walked into a laundromat and asked for a drink.

I drank before my date and now I’m at the mall. My date is at the bar.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doucet

When you poop before the sun even wakes up and you're still half-asleep and your brain is like why are you doing this to me

I did an early Doucet before my alarm even went off and I still don’t know why I did it

My early Doucet was so loud my mom thought the house was on fire

I did an early Doucet and then went back to bed and forgot about it until my brother screamed at me

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doucet

A wide receiver who also poops like a woman when someone else says they’re going to the bathroom

I was about to go to the bathroom when Early Doucet ran in and pooped on me

Early Doucet came out of the bathroom like she just won the lottery and I was still waiting

I told Early Doucet I needed the bathroom and she just pooped in front of me and said 'you’re not getting it'

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doucet

A tiny poop that comes out before the big one and makes you think you’re going to have a normal day

I had an early Doucet and thought I was done, but then the big one hit me and I cried

Early Doucet came out and I was like ‘okay, this is fine’ and then the real one came and I screamed

I did an early Doucet and then my pants were soaked and I didn’t even know why

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doors

Early doors is when you show up so early it feels like you're trying to beat the sun to the venue just to save face.

I got to the club before the bouncer even showed up. The sun was still asleep.

She arrived at the bar before the first drink was poured. The bartender was confused.

He showed up at the concert before the band even got their instruments out. The crowd was still waiting for the doors to open.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doors

Early doors is when you're so eager to be somewhere you might as well have been born there.

He showed up at the concert before the tickets even sold out. People were still arguing over the price.

She came to the gig before the band had even packed their van. The roadies were still eating breakfast.

He was at the bar before the bartender had even opened the door. The place was still asleep.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doors

Early doors is when you arrive so early it’s like you were trying to prove the venue was wrong about the time.

He showed up at the club before the door even unlocked. The bouncer was still eating a sandwich.

She got to the gig before the first act even showed up. The crowd was still waiting for the doors to open.

He was at the bar before the bartender had even finished their coffee. The place was still in the middle of a nap.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doors

Early doors is when you arrive so fast you might as well have been born with a ticket in your hand.

He got to the club before the first drink was even poured. The bouncer was still arguing with the door.

She showed up at the gig before the band even packed their gear. The crowd was still waiting for the doors to open.

He was at the bar before the bartender had even unlocked the door. The place was still asleep.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doh

It’s so early I could punch the sun in the face and it would still be asleep.

I woke up at 5 AM and my dog was still snoring.

My alarm went off and I yelled at it like it stole my breakfast.

I tried to read and my eyes fell asleep.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doh

This early is like being born in a microwave.

I tried to make coffee and it took me 10 minutes just to find the kettle.

My brain is still in bed and it’s not coming out.

I saw my neighbor and he was already dressed like a clown.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Doh

So early it’s like the moon still thinks it’s nighttime.

I tried to eat breakfast and my toast fell on my head.

I saw my mom and she was already drinking wine.

My cat looked at me like I was crazy.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Dick

Copping a feel before the night even starts. Skipping the office party to go bang someone before the bar opens. Like a 10 a. m. cumshot.

I left my job at 11 to go see my ex. Early Dick, baby.

Had to ditch the meeting for a quickie. Early Dick, man.

Woke up at 9 and went straight to the hotel. Early Dick, all day.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Dick

Getting it on before the sun even wakes up. The kind of early you get hard at 6 a. m. and don't stop till noon.

Got up at 5 to bang my neighbor. Early Dick, baby.

Had a 7 a. m. session. Early Dick, man.

Ran into my crush at 8. Early Dick, all day.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Cuyler

Early Cuyler is a stupid hillbilly squid from the dumbest show ever. He lives in Georgia with his mom, his hot sister Lil, and his son Rusty. He drinks moonshine, robs stores, fights cops, smokes weed, and screams along to Lynyrd Skynyrd like a maniac.

I watched Squidbillies and cried. Early Cuyler is the worst. Also the best.

Early Cuyler robs a store and screams, 'I'm the king of the hillbilly squids!'

Lil is hot. Early Cuyler doesn't know that. He just robs stores and gets high.

by Slangipedia 17d ago

Early Cuyler

Early Cuyler is a redneck squid who lives in the woods with his mom, sister Lil, and his son. He drinks cheap liquor, robs the grocery store, fights cops, and screams at a band called Lynyrd Skynyrd like he's in a rock concert.

Early Cuyler robs the store again. He’s got a donkey-penis hat and a mullet. He’s a menace.

Early Cuyler’s son, Rusty, is the cutest. Early Cuyler doesn’t know that. He just robs stores and gets high.

I saw Early Cuyler at church. He was wearing a donkey-penis hat and yelling at the preacher.

by Slangipedia 17d ago