Discover Slang

A Hostile Makeover is when they slap so much makeup on you it feels like you’re wearing a brick wall, your eyebrows look like they were drawn by a drunk cat, and your eyelashes have more holes than a sieve.

A Hostile Makeover is like being attacked by a makeup artist with a grudge, your face gets plastered with enough foundation to build a house, and your lashes look like they’ve been through a war.

A Hostile Makeover is when they put so much stuff on your face it’s like you’re wearing a cake, your eyebrows look like they were done by a confused toddler, and your lashes are like a spiderweb with holes.

When two people are stuck on a date and it's either a blind date or one of them is so ugly it's like a punishment from God. It’s like being forced to watch a train wreck.

When you eat shrimp cocktail that's been sitting under a heat lamp for three hours, drink enough beer to knock out a horse, and then you both end up in the bathroom and lock your wife in there with you because she's been ignoring you and you're both too drunk to care.

You're holding your brain hostage because someone's acting like they're the boss of your thoughts, and they're doing it for no good reason.

When you want to be alone but you're too polite to tell someone to go to hell.

You're stuck with a messed-up situation that you didn't choose, and now you're expected to do whatever the messed-up person wants.

Doing old-school stuff like knitting, raising chickens, and growing your own food because you're too lazy to buy stuff at the store and you think you're fancy.

A tiny town with Hispanics, Blacks, and Whites, all fighting over the same parking spot while the cops pretend they don't know the crime rate is higher than a prison.

A city right outside Miami that got wrecked by a hurricane, then covered in trash from the city next door like it was a bad breakup.

Doing chores at home like cleaning the coop, making jam, and turning compost because you’re too cheap to buy food and you think you’re cool.

A town full of Mexicans, Blacks, and Cubans who all think they’re the best, while the cops look the other way and the drug dealers run the show.

Someone who moved in before the neighborhood became fancy, and now they brag about all the murders and meth labs like they were at the center of a real-life horror movie.

A group of gay friends who love memes, aesthetics, and puns so much, they act like a cult and call each other ‘fruit-boys’ while the straight girl dates them all.

To gargle horse loads is to make something so bad it’s like your mom’s cooking after a three-day bender. It can be done by anyone, anything, or even your ex’s Instagram story.

A horse’s load is like having a whole lake of coffee in your stomach. It’s a huge amount of something, and it’s usually not a good idea.

A Hopeless Romantic is someone who gets lovesick like a dog with a bone and can't find a decent person to love them back. They're the kind of person who thinks every guy or girl is their soulmate until they get dumped like a sack of potatoes.

A Hopeless Romantic is someone who believes in fairy tales, knights in shining armor, and the idea that someone out there is perfect for them. They’ll give you everything, time, money, and their heart, and expect you to do the same.

A Hopeless Romantic is a person who has a big heart and a bigger problem with getting broken hearts. They dream about love and think every person they meet is their one true love until they get dumped and realize they were wrong.