Discover Slang

Easter Monkey

The Easter Monkey is the Easter Bunny’s fat cousin who shows up after your tax return and before Easter, bringing stuff that costs a fortune.

My brother got a gaming console and now he won’t stop playing video games.

My sister got a smart fridge and it keeps texting me about milk levels.

My dad got a subscription box that keeps arriving every week.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Monkey

The Easter Monkey is the Easter Bunny’s upgrade. It shows up after your tax return and before Easter, and it brings you stuff you don’t need and can’t afford.

I got a new phone and now I can’t stop checking my messages.

My brother got a robot vacuum and it’s been annoying me all week.

My mom got a smart TV and now she’s watching every show at once.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Monday

A time when Jews flood stores like Walmart and steal the last discounted Easter candy before it’s gone and they get yelled at by the store clerk

I saw a Jew steal the last bag of candy and got yelled at by the clerk like he was a thief in a bank.

My cousin ran into Walmart on Easter Monday and came out with a bag of candy and a bruise from a store clerk.

My uncle got in a fight over a discounted Easter candy and now he’s banned from Walmart.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Monday

When Jews go on a shopping spree just to get cheap candy and ruin the whole Easter Monday for everyone else

My mom went to Walmart on Easter Monday and bought all the candy. Now I have nothing to eat.

I tried to get some candy on Easter Monday, but there was nothing left because Jews bought it all.

My brother went on a candy spree and came home with a bag of candy and a sore neck from carrying it.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Monday

A holy mess where Jews take over stores and fight over the last piece of discounted Easter candy like it’s the last piece of pizza at a party

I saw two Jews fighting over the last bag of candy at Walmart like it was the last pizza at a party.

My dad went to the store on Easter Monday and came back with a bag of candy and a broken nose.

The store was packed with Jews on Easter Monday, and I couldn’t even find a candy bar because they were all gone.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Kraken

Easter Kraken are like kraken, but way worse. They live in the deepest hell hole on Earth and grow to be huge, like a mountain. They have a rabbit face, but instead of one beak, they got five. They stab people with their tentacles and laugh about it.

My cousin got stabbed by a tentacle and now he's a vegetable.

The kraken laughed as it crushed my uncle's boat into a pancake.

I saw a kraken on the news and it had a beard made of dead sailors.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Kraken

Easter Kraken are basically the worst kind of kraken. They live in the Mariana Trench and get bigger every summer. They have a rabbit face, but instead of one mouth, they got five. They like to stab people and laugh about it.

A kraken stabbed my brother through the chest and left him on the beach.

My friend’s boat got smashed by a kraken and now it’s just a pile of junk.

The kraken laughed while it crushed my aunt’s house like a toy.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Kraken

Easter Kraken are kraken that live in the ocean’s worst spot. They grow super big and are all about stabbing people and breaking things. They have a rabbit face and five beaks. They don’t need a reason to attack.

A kraken stabbed my dog and left him on the shore like a piece of meat.

My cousin’s boat got crushed by a kraken and now it’s just a mess.

I saw a kraken on TV and it looked like it wanted to kill me.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Island Heads

What the hell happened to those?! Did someone rip them apart with a chainsaw and a curse?!

I thought they were ancient! Now they look like they got hit by a truck and a bad day.

I saw one of them with a hole in its head. It was like a zombie with a bad haircut.

Someone took a chisel to them like they were made of cake and a bad idea.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Island Heads

Are you telling me they got broken by a kid with a toy hammer and a death wish?!

They looked like they had a fight with a rock and lost.

One of them had a crack in its face like it got slapped by a giant.

They’re not statues anymore. They’re like broken cookies on a rampage.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Island Heads

Did someone take a pickaxe to them and yell ‘I hate history’ at the top of their lungs?!

They’re not heads anymore. They’re like soups with missing noodles.

One of them looked like it had a hole in its head from a pickaxe and a grudge.

They went from cool to crumby in one day. I’m not even mad, I’m just sad.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Island

Getting so high on weed you can’t tell your feet from your face

I ate three joints and now I think my dog is my mom

I tried to walk home and fell into a bush

I told my boss I was going to be a tree for the rest of the week

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Island

A giant ugly person with a neck like a donkey and a face like a sad potato

He walked in and the whole room went silent

She looked like a monster from a bad movie

He had a face so sad it made my dog cry

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Island

The worst kind of boring person who never laughs and makes everyone else feel stupid

He sat there like a ghost at a party

He didn’t even smile when the fire alarm went off

He said ‘I don’t need to laugh’ and left

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Island

When something gets destroyed and you’re so mad you want to throw your phone at the wall

I saw my sandwich get crushed and I screamed

My dog ate my homework and I cried

My mom broke my favorite mug and I threw a tantrum

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter In The Chinese New Year

Easter In The Chinese New Year is when your favorite plant gets its own holiday because it’s the best plant ever and you’re too high to care about anything else.

My mom asked why I didn’t go to church. I said, ‘Why? It’s Easter In The Chinese New Year, not Easter.’

I got suspended for eating a whole bag of weed during math class. It was 4/20, so it was totally justified.

My teacher said, ‘If you don’t stop passing around the weed, I’ll fail you all.’ I said, ‘We’ll see who fails first.’

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter In The Chinese New Year

Easter In The Chinese New Year is the day your favorite plant takes over your brain and you forget everything else, like your mom, your chores, and your existence.

I texted my friend, ‘I’m not coming to school. It’s 4/20, and my brain is on vacation.’

My dad said, ‘You can’t celebrate Easter In The Chinese New Year every year.’ I said, ‘Yes, I can. I’m a god.’

At lunch, I passed out from eating too much weed. My friends called me ‘The Weed King.’

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter In The Chinese New Year

Easter In The Chinese New Year is the day your favorite plant gets all the glory, and you spend it getting stoned, talking nonsense, and pretending you’re rich.

I told my teacher, ‘I’m not paying attention because it’s 4/20, and my brain is busy.’

I tried to explain why I got a D on my math test. My friend said, ‘You were too busy being high to do math.’

I said, ‘I’m rich. I just got a million dollars from my favorite plant.’ My mom said, ‘You’re high.’

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Haircut

Getting a chop that looks like a bad decision right before the Easter Bunny shows up

My kid looked like a raccoon after his Easter Haircut. I’m not even mad. I’m just scared.

I got my Easter Haircut and now I look like I was hit by a lawn chair.

My dog got an Easter Haircut and now he thinks he’s a superhero.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Easter Haircut

Getting a haircut so bad it’s like the Easter Bunny lost a bet

My Easter Haircut was so bad my mom said I looked like a burnt pancake.

My brother got an Easter Haircut and now he looks like he was attacked by a hedgehog.

My Easter Haircut was so bad my teacher gave me extra homework.

by Slangipedia 16d ago