A Retardation
When you're so dumb you think you're smart and you talk about it all the time.
I said I'm not a retard and then I spilled my drink
I called my friend a retard and then I cried
My teacher said I'm a retard and I said I'm not
Discover Slang
A Reuben Pearce
A Reuben Pearce is a lumpy, face-melting mess who looks like they were dropped in a garbage can. They try to play football like it's a sport, but it's more like a curse.
'Reuben Pearce? That's the guy who tried to tackle me and tripped over his own feet.'
'He looks like he was born in a sock.'
''Reuben Pearce? He's the reason why the team lost the game.'
A Reuben Pearce
A Reuben Pearce is a human disaster who eats so much they look like they're about to burst. They play football like it's a joke, and girls laugh at them.
'He ate three pizzas before the game and looked like a balloon.'
'He tried to run and fell over like a drunk potato.'
''Reuben Pearce? He's the reason why the girls all left the game.'
A Reuben Pearce
A Reuben Pearce is a walking embarrassment who is as short as a shrimp and as fat as a donut. They can't even catch a ball without falling over.
'He's shorter than my dog and fatter than my uncle.'
'He tried to catch the ball and fell flat on his face.'
''Reuben Pearce? He's the reason why the team looks like a joke.'
A Renner
When you mess up your computer by downloading a bunch of apps that look cool but do nothing. You think you're being smart, but you're just a sad, confused idiot.
My laptop is slower than my grandma. I downloaded 20 apps just because they had cool names.
I turned my computer into a toaster. I promise I didn’t mean to.
I installed a app called 'Space Invaders' and now my screen is full of aliens.
A Renner
A guy who looks like a million bucks but only wants one girl. He’s got the body of a god, the face of a superhero, and the confidence of a king. But he still kisses his mom. That’s just rude.
He walked into the bar and every woman dropped their drinks. He just smiled and said, 'I’m here for my girl.'
He’s got more muscles than my gym teacher. But he only likes one girl. That’s just plain mean.
He’s got the looks of a movie star but he still says 'good night' to his mom. That’s just low.
A Renner
That guy you’re obsessed with who only likes you a little. He’s got a ginger head, a funny mouth, and a heart that’s too busy being distracted by other people.
He’s my favorite person, but he only likes me as a friend. I think he’s a little mean.
He’s got a ginger head and a laugh that makes me giggle like a fool. But he still likes other girls.
I love him more than my life, but he only likes me like a side dish.
A Renner
When you’re promised a big role but end up with nothing but a background spot. It’s like getting sent to Mandyville, but with more embarrassment.
They told me I’d be the star, but I ended up being the guy in the background. That’s just cruel.
I was supposed to be famous. Now I’m just the guy who walks in the background. That’s just a slap in the face.
I got a role, but it was so small it didn’t even have a name. That’s just sad.
A Renner
A name for someone who’s so dumb you can’t even understand them. They talk like they’re from another planet and make no sense at all.
He said, 'I like pizza and also the moon.' That’s not a sentence. That’s a scream.
She talks like she’s from Mars. I can’t even understand her.
He told me he eats clouds for breakfast. That’s not a normal person.
A Renner
A guy who looks like a superhero but only has 11 arrows. Sometimes 12, but it’s not safe. He’s brave, but he’s also kind of stupid.
He’s got 11 arrows and he’s fighting like it’s the end of the world. That’s just brave and kind of stupid.
He’s got 12 arrows but he uses them all at once. That’s just dumb.
He’s got the look of a god but he only carries 11 arrows. That’s just a waste.
A Renner
When a tool looks easy to use but ends up hurting you badly. It’s like getting hit by a bus but with more confusion.
I used that tool once and now my hand is broken. That’s not a tool, that’s a weapon.
I thought it was simple. Now my finger is broken. That’s just a curse.
I used that thing and now I can’t feel my hand. That’s just a punishment.
A Reported Trauma: The First Infantile Release
A human who can't stop picking at their butt like it's a treasure map and they're looking for gold.
I had to pick my butt during my Zoom meeting. My boss asked if I was having a stroke.
My dog tried to help me pick my butt. Now I have a dog with a broken nose.
I picked my butt so hard I got a tattoo of a sore. It's called 'The Sore That Would Not Die.'
A Reported Trauma: The First Infantile Release
People who think sitting on a toilet is a full-time job and they’re doing it wrong.
I sat on the toilet for three hours. My butt now has a life of its own.
My friend tried to do a squat on the toilet. Now she’s stuck in the toilet forever.
I sat on the toilet so long I became a toilet. My name is now 'Toilet 2.0.'
A Reported Trauma: The First Infantile Release
A human who thinks their butt is a canvas and they're the only artist who can paint it.
I painted my butt with glitter. Now I look like a glittery butt on a Sunday morning.
My friend drew a dragon on their butt. Now the dragon comes to life every time they sit down.
I painted my butt so hard my mom thought I had a new tattoo. It was just glitter. And a dragon.
A Renzo
A Renzo is when a past tense verb gets wrecked by a should have or did, like a grammar disaster that only Renzo can pull off.
Should have went to the party but did went to the bar instead.
Did eat the whole pizza and should have shared it.
Should have done his homework but did did nothing.
A Renzo
Most Renzo are nice, fun, and like to play around, but don't be fooled, they take relationships seriously and will cheat if you let them.
He said he'd come to the concert but showed up with his ex.
He told me he'd never leave me, then he did.
He said he'd stop eating pizza, then he ate three slices.
A Renzo
Renzo is the best friend you ever had, he'll laugh at your jokes, tell the truth, and even be nice to your ex.
He told me my ex was ugly, then he asked her out.
He laughed at my failed attempt at a magic trick.
He told my mom I was a brat, then he bought me ice cream.
A Renzo
Renzo comes from Latin, it means 'covered in laurel' or 'the greatest man alive.' Either way, you're lucky to know one.
He told me he was the greatest man alive, then he lost to a 10-year-old.
He said he was covered in laurel, then he spilled wine on his shirt.
He claimed he was from Latin, then he said he didn't know what that meant.
A Renzo
Renzo is amazing, he's funny, loyal, and will do anything for you, even if he trips over his own feet doing it.
He tried to do a magic trick and fell into a puddle.
He kept my secret, even when I told him my ex was coming.
He told me he'd never leave me, then he did.
A Renzo
The best man alive, treat him right or he'll ruin your life.
He ruined my birthday by telling my mom I was a brat.
He told my ex I was ugly, then he asked her out.
He said he'd never leave me, then he did.