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Early Morning-ing
when you wake up with a headache, a bunch of friends, and no idea how you got there. You all go eat, laugh, and remember the night before, but only because someone took a picture of you wearing a sock on your head.
Woke up with a sock on my head, a girl on my lap, and my friend eating a muffin like it’s a war crime.
Early morning-ing is when you eat so much breakfast, you forget you were drunk last night.
Woke up with a hangover, a group of friends, and a camera pointing at me like I’m famous.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning-ing
the morning after a crazy night, you’re all hungover, half-dressed, and stuck in a pile of beds and couches. You eat junk food, watch terrible movies, and argue over who took the last shot of whiskey.
Woke up with a hangover, a girl on my chest, and my friend eating cereal like it’s a competition.
Early morning-ing is when you’re too hungover to care about the mess, but you still argue about who spilled the coffee.
Woke up with a headache, a group of friends, and a camera taking pictures of my face like I’m in a commercial.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Suprise
A woman wakes up and yawns loud enough to scare the dog while you shove your dick in her mouth like it's a breakfast sandwich.
My mom yawned so hard she woke the neighbors, and I ate my breakfast in her mouth.
She stretched like a cat and I stuck my dick in her mouth like it was a snack.
She woke up and yawned like she just ran a marathon, and I shoved my dick in her mouth like it was a donut.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Suprise
You wake up a woman with a loud mouth full of morning breath and a hard-on that could knock out a horse.
I woke her up with my mouth full of coffee and my dick full of morning energy.
She opened her mouth like a fish and I stuck my dick in like it was a fishbowl.
She woke up with a mouth full of breakfast and I stuck my dick in like it was a meatball.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Suprise
You ambush a woman right when she’s trying to catch her Zs and you stuff your dick in her mouth like it’s a surprise party.
She was halfway to sleep when I stuck my dick in her mouth like it was a wake-up call.
She was dreaming about pizza when I threw my dick in her mouth like it was a surprise.
She was trying to nap and I stuck my dick in her mouth like it was a prank.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Dip
A man wakes up early, hard as a rock, and decides to stick it to his sleeping wife without her knowing.
He jacked off in her face while she was still snoring.
He woke her up by slamming her against the wall with his morning wood.
He made her scream so loud the neighbors called the cops.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Dip
A guy gets up before his wife, has a boner, and decides to take advantage of her while she's still dreaming.
He poked her in the ribs with his morning stiffy and laughed.
He woke her up by shoving his cock in her mouth while she was still asleep.
He made her cry because he was too loud and too rough.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Dip
A man wakes up before his wife, gets a hard-on, and decides to give her a surprise early morning butt plug.
He shoved his cock in her butt before she even opened her eyes.
He woke her up by sticking it to her while she was still half-asleep.
She screamed so loud the dog ran out of the house.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Cannonball
A giant poop you blast out of your body right after you wake up like you’re trying to end the day before it starts
I woke up and felt like I had a rocket in my butt
After that taco night, I took a cannonball so big it woke up my dog
I peed and pooped at the same time. It was a full on early morning explosion
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Cannonball
The first thing you do when you wake up is poop so hard it sounds like a war broke out in your colon
I woke up and my toilet looked like a battlefield
That morning poop was so loud my neighbor came to investigate
I took such a big one I thought my pants were going to fall off
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Cannonball
When you wake up and your body decides to throw a party in your intestines and everyone’s invited
My intestines threw me a party at 7 AM and I couldn’t say no
I woke up and my guts were going wild
That morning poop was like a festival in my stomach
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Cannonball
You wake up and your butt is so full of poop it’s like it’s going to burst out of your pants and say hello to the world
I woke up and my pants were about to have a breakout
My morning poop was so big it had its own zip code
I took such a big one it looked like my pants were going to have a baby
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Cannonball
When you wake up and your poop is so big it could knock out a door and take a nap afterwards
That morning poop was so strong it knocked my toilet off its hinges
I took a cannonball so big it could’ve been a doorstop
My poop was like a superhero, it did everything and still had energy left
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Morning Cannonball
You wake up and your poop is like a monster that just ate your whole breakfast and is now trying to escape through your pants
My morning poop was like a monster escaping from my butt
That poop came out like a monster with a grudge
I woke up and my pants were being attacked by a poop monster
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Mark
Getting out of a place you're supposed to be before it's time because you're too lazy or too dumb to stay.
I left math class early because I didn't want to do homework. I got a warning.
She left work early because she didn't want to deal with her boss. He yelled at her.
He left school early because he didn't want to be late for lunch. He was late for lunch.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Mark
A sneaky way to leave a place before it's time because you're too much of a coward to face the consequences.
I left the meeting early because I was scared of getting in trouble. I didn't get in trouble.
He left the office early because he didn't want to stay late. He stayed late anyway.
She left the class early because she didn't want to answer a question. She had to answer a question.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Mark
When you get to leave before your time is up because you're too stupid to realize you're still supposed to be there.
I left the meeting early because I thought I had a free period. I didn't have a free period.
He left school early because he thought he had a pass. He didn't have a pass.
She left work early because she thought she had a day off. She didn't have a day off.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Mark
A way to leave before you're supposed to because you're too much of a brat to stay and suffer.
I left the class early because I didn't want to do my work. I got in trouble.
He left school early because he didn't want to do his homework. He got in trouble.
She left work early because she didn't want to talk to her boss. She got in trouble.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Mark
When you sneak out before your time is up because you're too much of a scumbag to wait.
I left the class early because I didn't want to be there. I was there.
He left work early because he didn't want to be there. He was there.
She left school early because she didn't want to be there. She was there.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
Early Man
A lousy hero who shows up way before a crime even happens and then takes forever to mess it up because he’s too busy being a waste of time.
Early Man showed up 12 hours before the bank heist and spent 8 of them arguing with a squirrel.
He arrived at the crime scene before the criminals even had coffee.
Early Man showed up before the robbery started and then took a 3-hour nap in the middle of the street.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
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