Discover Slang

Earthing Ablution

Earthing ablution is like a poor man’s shower. You hit the ground with your hands like you’re angry, blow off the dust, and rub your face like it’s your last chance to look decent.

I did the earthing ablution in the park, and a kid asked if I was doing a magic trick.

I had to do the earthing ablution after I ejaculated in my pants, and it felt like I was confessing to a priest.

I did the earthing ablution in the middle of the street, and the cops thought I was having a mental breakdown.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing Ablution

Earthing ablution is when you slap the earth like it owes you money, then blow off your hands like you just kissed a skunk, and rub your face like you’re trying to erase the day.

I did the earthing ablution in my mom’s kitchen, and she thought I was possessed.

After I came in my pants, I did the earthing ablution, and my face looked like it had been dragged through a pigpen.

I did the earthing ablution in a church, and the priest asked if I was trying to summon demons.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing

Walking on grass with no shoes on to suck the earths energy up through your feet like a greedy kid at a candy store.

My feet are now powered by the earth. I can feel it in my toes.

I walked on the grass for 10 minutes and my soul got a massage.

I’m basically a battery now. I’m gonna shock someone.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing

Putting your junk in the dirt to clean it out and make it feel brand new. Invented by a man who probably smells like old socks.

I buried my privates in the dirt and came out like a fresh loaf of bread.

Daniel Musgrave is a legend. He probably smells like a compost pile.

I did earthing and my junk is now a holy relic.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing

It’s mostly okay, but don’t let it fool you. It’s like a chihuahua, cute but annoying.

Earthing is like my chihuahua. It’s cute, but it barks at me all day.

I thought it was harmless, but now I’m stuck with it.

It’s like a chihuahua that won’t stop barking at the mailman.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing

A giant ball of madness that’s mostly filled with bugs that want to stab you in the face.

Earth is like a giant bug prison. Everyone’s a prisoner.

I think the earth is trying to kill me with ants.

It’s like a bug hotel and everyone is a guest.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing

God’s favorite reality show. It’s like watching your cousins fight over a couch.

Earth is like a reality show where everyone is related and they all hate each other.

God watches this show and laughs like a maniac.

It’s like watching my family fight over a piece of pizza.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing

A planet that’s going to be blown up by aliens because it’s in the way of their highway.

Vogans are gonna blow up Earth because it’s blocking their highway.

I’m gonna be dead because of a stupid alien highway.

Earth is like a traffic cone in the middle of a highway.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthing

A pretty good place until humans showed up and turned it into a trash can with a McDonalds on it.

Humans turned Earth into a giant trash can with a burger on top.

Earth used to be nice, now it’s just a mess.

I miss the old Earth. Now it’s just a McDonalds and a bunch of trash.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthice

A salty boi is someone who talks trash and acts like they're the best thing since sliced bread, but they're just a bunch of hot air.

'You're just a washed-up loser who can't even beat me in a game of Fortnite.'

'You think you're cool? I've seen cooler dogs at the park.'

'You got lucky this one time. That's it.'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthice

A salty boi is a person who throws a tantrum whenever they don't get their way and thinks everyone else is a fool.

'You didn't even try! I could've beaten you with my eyes closed!'

'You're so dumb, I could teach a goldfish to beat you.'

'You're just mad because I'm better than you.'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthice

A salty boi is someone who acts like the world revolves around them and gets annoyed when it doesn't.

'I was the best at this game! You're just jealous!'

'You're not even good enough to be my friend.'

'I could've been number one if you hadn't ruined it!'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthice

A salty boi is a person who's always talking bad about others and has no clue how bad they actually are.

'You're the worst! I could've beaten you with a spoon!'

'You're so bad, I could've beaten you in my sleep.'

'You're just mad because I'm better than you!'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthice

A salty boi is someone who's always bragging and doesn't know when to stop, even when they're clearly losing.

'I'm the best! You're just a nobody!'

'You're so bad, I could've beaten you with my eyes closed!'

'You're just mad because I'm better than you!'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthice

A salty boi is a person who can't take criticism and thinks they're the greatest, even when they're clearly not.

'You're so bad, I could've beaten you with my eyes closed!'

'You're just mad because I'm better than you!'

'You're the worst! I could've beaten you with a spoon!'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthfucked

When Earth takes a huge dump on you all at once because it’s mad and doesn’t care who gets hit.

The earthquake, tsunami, and volcano all happened in one day. Earth said, 'I’m done with you people.'

The city got hit by a hurricane, a flood, and a wildfire. Earth just flipped its lid.

The town was destroyed by a massive storm, a mudslide, and a fire. Earth was like, 'I’m not even mad, I’m just tired of you.'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthfucked

A big-time meltdown from Earth that throws everything at you at once, just to make you suffer.

The earthquake, tornado, and flood all hit the same town in one day. Earth was like, 'Let’s see how tough you are.'

The volcano erupted, the ground shook, and the ocean rose. Earth was giving you the finger.

The city was destroyed by a hurricane, a fire, and a landslide. Earth was just having fun.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthfucked

When Earth goes full-on rage mode and throws every disaster it has at you in one go.

The earthquake, flood, and tornado all hit the same town in one day. Earth was like, 'I’m not mad, I’m just messing with you.'

The city got hit by a volcano, a tsunami, and a fire. Earth was just having a bad day.

The town was destroyed by a hurricane, a mudslide, and a wildfire. Earth was like, 'You think this is bad? Wait till next time.'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthfucked

A triple whammy of disasters from Earth because it's tired of your nonsense and wants you to feel it.

The earthquake, flood, and fire all hit the same town at once. Earth was like, 'This is your punishment.'

The city got hit by a hurricane, a tornado, and a landslide. Earth was giving you the middle finger.

The town was destroyed by a volcano, a tsunami, and a wildfire. Earth was like, 'I’m done with you.'

by Slangipedia 16d ago

Earthfucked

When Earth decides to punch you in the face with three different disasters at once because it's angry.

The earthquake, flood, and fire all hit the same town. Earth was like, 'Let’s see how tough you are.'

The city got hit by a hurricane, a tornado, and a landslide. Earth was having a meltdown.

The town was destroyed by a volcano, a tsunami, and a wildfire. Earth was just having fun.

by Slangipedia 16d ago