Discover Slang

At the tie-dye party, the hippies tried to make shirts, but it turned into a hippie wait because they spent more time arguing about the color of the sunset than actually dyeing fabric.

The hippies tried to start a band, but it turned into a hippie wait because no one knew the chords and everyone just kept shouting random lyrics.

The hippies wanted to start a fire, but it turned into a hippie wait because they all sat around trying to count how many clouds passed by.

The hippies tried to start a food fight, but it turned into a hippie wait because they all forgot what food was and just sat around eating dirt.

The hippies tried to hold a protest, but it turned into a hippie wait because no one knew what the protest was about and everyone just sat around eating mushrooms.

The hippies tried to write a poem, but it turned into a hippie wait because they all just sat around eating bread and staring at the moon.

My teacher said I was a fake Jew because I didn't eat enough bagels.

He claimed he was a victim of the Holocaust just to skip homework.

She wore a yarmulke in the cafeteria to look cool and get a free lunch.

He cried in class about being oppressed because he didn’t know what Passover was.

She told the principal she was a victim of anti-Semitism just to avoid detention.

He wore a kippah in the gym to look tough and get picked first in basketball.

He said he was Jewish to get a free homework pass and eat pizza every Friday.

She claimed she was a Holocaust survivor just to skip the math test.

He wore a tallit in science class to look smart and get an A.

He told the bus driver he was Jewish so he could sit in the front seat and avoid cleaning the bus.

She said she was a victim of anti-Semitism just to get out of doing the dishes.

He wore a mezuzah on his backpack to look holy and get extra snacks.

He claimed he was Jewish to get a 100 on the test even though he didn’t study.

She said she was a victim of the Holocaust just to get out of morning announcements.

He wore a Star of David necklace to look cool and skip gym class.

He told the whole school he was Jewish to get a free lunch and make everyone else hungry.

She cried about being oppressed just to get out of running laps.

He wore a tallit in the hallway to look like a real religious person and get extra candy.

My inbox just got wiped by A Hilly Clinton. What even was that?

I sent a birthday message to my mom and it vanished. A Hilly Clinton did this.

I tried to email my boss and it said 'Message not sent. A Hilly Clinton is watching you.'

I asked if the coffee was good and he yelled at me for 10 minutes. A Hilly Clinton, for sure.

He complained about the weather and then called me a failure. A Hilly Clinton, definitely.

He saw a squirrel and started screaming about life. A Hilly Clinton is here.

Hey babe, send me your nudes or I'll die

You ignored my 20 texts, so I'm gonna call you a fat cow

I'm not blocking you until you send me that pic

I'm the bestest ever, like, the bestestest

I'm so awesome, even my dog says so

Bestestestestestestest

I smoked weed and drove like a maniac on a bumpy road

I drove on a back road with no traffic and it was lit

I was driving on hills at night and I was high

I'm wasted and I want sex, drugs, and rock and roll

I'm talking way too much and I'm annoying

I'm begging you for everything and I'm wasted

Send me nudes or I'll haunt you

I'm a creepy guy who won't stop asking for nudes

I'm a baby emu and I'm cute

I stopped drinking and went to bed early

I’m soft and weird

I’m a soft cock who goes to bed early

I have a weird patch of hair on my head

It looks like a bird's butt

It's a white spot on my head

I drank a Highlander and my buddy lost his head. Literally.

That beer was a Highlander. My head felt like it was ripped off.

I tried a Highlander and my cousin’s head was on the floor. I didn’t even know he was there.

That movie got an Oscar? It was worse than my ex’s cooking.

The Highlander won the Oscar? I’d rather watch paint dry.

They gave the Oscar to Highlander? That’s like giving a gold star to a toddler who drew a stick figure.

He got shot three times and still stayed in the game. That guy is a masochist.

I’ve seen the Highlander get hit ten times and still laugh it off.

That paintball player is a Highlander. He’s not leaving until he’s dead.