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paedolove
A guy who can't keep his hands off young girls and thinks they're the best thing since pizza.
He tried to hug the girl and ended up knocking over a water bottle.
He grabbed the girl’s backpack and said, 'This is the best backpack ever.'
He tried to give the girl a high-five and then asked for her phone number.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedolove
A man who thinks a kid is cute and then acts like he's been given the key to heaven.
He saw the girl and said, 'This is like getting a gold star and a pizza.'
He told the girl he would marry her when he grew up.
He asked the girl to be his girlfriend and then cried when she said no.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedoling
a gross, illegal habit where adults chase kids for sex like they're hot dogs at a carnival. it's dirty and nobody wants to admit it.
'I saw him following my daughter home. He looked like a pervert with a map.'
'He got caught in the school parking lot. The principal was so mad, he got suspended for life.'
'He asked my kid for a hug, then tried to rip her clothes off. Classic.'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedoling
when grown-ups act like animals and go after kids for sex. it’s low, it’s shameful, and it’s happening everywhere.
'He was in the library. I swear he was looking at me like I was a snack.'
'She got caught with a guy in the store. The manager was so embarrassed, he fired her on the spot.'
'He asked my kid to his house. I drove there, and it was like a horror movie.'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedoling
a nasty, illegal thing where adults chase kids for sex like they're the last piece of pizza. it's disgusting and nobody wants to talk about it.
'He was following my kid on the bus. I told him to stop, and he just laughed.'
'She got caught with him in the mall. Her mom was so mad, she drove there and yelled at him.'
'He asked my kid to his house. I went, and it was like a nightmare.'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedoling
when adults get obsessed with kids and try to have sex with them. it's stupid, it's gross, and it's everywhere.
'He was in the park. My kid saw him, and she ran away.'
'She got caught with him at the movie theater. Her dad was so angry, he got a restraining order.'
'He asked my kid to his house. I went, and I swear it was like a horror film.'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedoling
a smelly, illegal thing where adults chase kids for sex like they're the last candy bar. it's stupid and it's everywhere.
'He was in the school hallway. My kid saw him and ran away.'
'She got caught with him in the store. Her mom was so mad, she yelled at him.'
'He asked my kid to his house. I went, and it was like a nightmare.'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedolimb
A fake leg or arm that perverts use to peek at kids. It can be disconnected and hidden somewhere to send pictures back to the stubby pervert.
The paedolimb was hidden under a park bench. He watched the little girl swing for hours.
He left his paedolimb in the library. It snapped photos of kids reading quietly.
The paedolimb was stuck in a vending machine. It sent a video of a kid buying candy.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedolimb
A fake body part that lets a pervert watch kids without being seen. It can be dropped off somewhere else to send pictures of kids.
He dropped his paedolimb in a pizza box. It sent pictures of kids eating cheese.
The paedolimb was in a backpack. It took photos of kids on the bus.
He left the paedolimb in a movie theater. It snapped pictures of kids laughing.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedolimb
A fake limb that lets a pervert peek at kids. It can be sent away to take pictures and send them back to the stubby pervert.
He sent his paedolimb to a toy store. It took pictures of kids playing with toys.
The paedolimb was stuck in a soda can. It sent videos of kids drinking soda.
He left the paedolimb in a subway. It took pictures of kids riding the train.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedogonk
a guy who should be minding his own business at the tackle shop but instead lures kids with his hairy chest and a nipple ring that screams 'look at me'.
DM: 'bro why are you at the mall? you should be at the tackle shop'
text: 'he showed up at the skate park with no shirt on and a ring on his nipple'
tweet: 'that guy at the tackle shop is a paedogonk and i hate him'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedogonk
a man who thinks he's still cool just because he has a tattoo and a nipple ring. he hangs out with kids to feel young again, even though he smells like old bait.
text: 'he told me he was 21, but he smells like a fishbowl'
DM: 'why is he at the arcade? he should be at the tackle shop'
tweet: 'the paedogonk is trying to be cool again, but he failed'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedogonk
a middle-aged man who thinks showing off his chest hair and ring is the same as being a rock star. he hangs out with kids just to feel important.
text: 'he took off his shirt at the park and yelled 'look at me''
DM: 'he tried to be a rock star but he just looks like a weird guy'
tweet: 'the paedogonk is trying to be a rock star and it's not working'
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedofriend
A fake friend who sends you creepy messages and wants to touch you in places you shouldn't be touched.
He sent me a photo of his bald head and said I was beautiful.
He asked if I wanted to go to his house for a 'sleepover' with no parents.
He kept texting me at 2 a. m. with his bare feet on my phone screen.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedofriend
A guy who acts like your friend but is really just trying to get into your pants and has no life.
He said he was going to the mall but really just wanted to see me.
He DMed me 10 times in one day about his video game.
He kept asking if I wanted to 'hang out' but never said what that meant.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedofriend
A guy who thinks he's cool but is just trying to get it on with you and has zero style.
He wore a hoodie inside out and called it 'fashion' just to talk to me.
He said he was a 'legend' but couldn't even spell it right.
He asked if I wanted to 'grab a snack' but it was just a way to get me alone.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedofriend
A guy who lies about everything just to get you to talk to him and has the brain of a toaster.
He said he had a girlfriend but she was just his mom.
He said he was a 'rapper' but just rapped to me in the park.
He told me he was rich but had a job at a fast-food place.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedofriend
A guy who is your friend but is also your nightmare in disguise and has the charm of a used sock.
He said he was going to college but just sat in my room all day.
He kept talking about his 'big plans' but they were just to eat pizza.
He called me at 1 a. m. just to say he was bored.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedofrenia
A pervert who loves kids and has a head full of crazy stuff. Like a messed-up plug socket.
That guy at the park stared at my kid like he was a snack.
He tried to talk to my niece about aliens and porn.
He drew a penis on my kid's math test.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
paedofrenia
A man who likes kids and can't tell fantasy from reality. Like a plug socket that's on fire.
He told my kid he was the chosen one. Then he tried to kiss her.
He thought my son was a ghost because he wore a hat.
He started a wrestling match with my kid in the grocery store.
by Slangipedia 27d ago
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