Discover Slang

A Cougar Ate My Baby

your kid got taken by a woman who looks like a milf and smells like a dumpster.

He said she ‘dumped him in the trash.’

She sent him a text that said ‘Don’t come back unless you’re rich.’

He told me she ‘had the eyes of a hawk.’

A Cougar Ate My Baby

your kid got messed up by a woman who’s got the face of a model and the heart of a beast.

He said she ‘devoured him in the lunchroom.’

She sent him a DM that said ‘You’re my new snack.’

He came home with a coupon for a ‘second meal.’

A group of hot-ass troublemakers who make life a living hell for everyone.

My cousin's a Cosgrove. He's a walking disaster.

That family lives next door. They're like a Cosgrove.

My teacher said my family is a Cosgrove. I don’t know what that means, but I’m scared.

When a guy gets a hard-on just by watching his kid get born on a video. It’s weird, gross, and very specific.

My uncle watches his kid’s birth videos every day. He’s a Cosgrove.

That guy at the gym has a Cosgrove fetish. He’s weird.

My mom said my dad’s a Cosgrove. I believe her.

When you zoom past all the cars in front of you on the right when the road goes from two lanes to four at a crossroad. You're a lane hog.

I did a Cosgrove move at the traffic light. Everyone hated me.

That guy did a Cosgrove move. He’s a jerk.

My friend did a Cosgrove move and got a ticket.

A smelly, lazy, fat piece of garbage who loves to stink up the room.

My cousin is a Cosgrove. He smells like a garbage can.

That guy at the park is a Cosgrove. He’s lazy and smelly.

I don’t want to be a Cosgrove. That’s the worst.

The king of memes. He knows every meme and makes them better. He's the meme god.

The Cosgrove made that meme. It’s iconic.

My friend said the Cosgrove made that meme. It’s amazing.

That meme was made by the Cosgrove. He’s the king.

Proof you don't need talent to get a record deal. She’s a fake singer who’s on Nick. She’s very annoying.

That fake singer is a Cosgrove. She’s annoying.

My sister said that singer is a Cosgrove. She’s fake.

That singer is a Cosgrove. She’s annoying and fake.

A kid who was on a show called iCarly. She’s a fake singer who uses a computer to make her voice sound better. It’s fake and weird.

That kid on iCarly is a Cosgrove. Her voice is fake.

My cousin said that singer is a Cosgrove. She’s fake.

That singer on Nick is a Cosgrove. Her voice sounds like a computer.

A way of screaming that your life just got worse and you’re stuck with the worst possible version of it.

My math test was a cosmic cup of ass. I got a 37% and my dog laughed at me.

When I tried to explain my crush to my friend, it was a cosmic cup of ass. Now I’m the joke.

My mom said I had to clean my room. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

A loud expression used when you’re stuck in a bad situation and you know there’s no way out.

I got stuck in the worst traffic ever. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

My teacher gave me extra homework for no reason. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

I had to eat my lunch in front of the whole class. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

A shout that means you’re completely screwed and nothing is going to help you.

I failed my science project. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

My dad said I had to do the dishes every day. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

I got picked last for gym. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

A loud yell that means everything is going wrong and you’re the only one who knows it.

I spilled my juice on my shirt. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

I got locked out of my house. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

My pet chicken ran away. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

A loud shout that says you’re stuck in the worst possible situation and you’re not getting out of it anytime soon.

I had to wear my pajamas to school. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

I got stuck with the worst group project ever. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

I got grounded for a whole month. That was a cosmic cup of ass.

The most awesome guy ever. He's smart, funny, and can make you feel like the world is your oyster. He's got a nose that smells like a dumpster fire and a heart that's softer than a baby's butt.

A Cortez walked into the room and the whole class shut up.

He texted me a meme of a cat wearing sunglasses and I laughed so hard I cried.

He cried when his mom got a tattoo of a flamingo.

The guy every girl wants. He’s cute, but he’ll take you on a ride so fast you’ll get motion sickness. He’s like a smoothie with way too much sugar and no sense of boundaries.

He asked me to prom and then took me to a 24-hour diner.

He said we could ‘just hang out’ and then drove me to the mall at 2 a. m.

He texted me a photo of a pizza with a duck on it and I said yes.

When you take the cap off a bottle of hard A and toss it like it’s your ex’s head. You’re saying, ‘I’m drinking this whole thing, and I’m not coming back.’

He threw the cap at a pigeon and said, ‘You’re the only one who’ll ever get this.’

He drank the whole bottle in one go and passed out on the floor.

He texted me, ‘I’m drinking this and I’m not coming back.’

The pirate who robs ships, steals treasure, and beats up people who don’t respect him. He’s got a hook for a hand and a laugh that sounds like a cannon firing.

He told me he robbed a ship and it was just a Walmart.

He said his hook was made from a sword and a piece of a broken heart.

He texted me, ‘I’m coming for you, and I bring pirates.’

A town where everyone’s high, everyone’s sad, and the only thing you do is drag main and try to find a can of soda at Wal-Mart.

I went to Cortez and got high with my best friend’s mom.

I tried to drag main and ended up in a trailer park.

The only thing I found at Wal-Mart was a can of soda and my life.