Discover Slang

A Matt Cooper
When you fake hating your twin brother because you're actually obsessed with him and it's gross
I swear I'm going to kill you for stealing my pizza again
You're the worst brother ever
If you don't stop calling me a baby, I'll beat you up
A Matt Cooper
Lying about hating your twin brother when you're really just a love sick mess
You're the most annoying person I know
I would rather die than be stuck with you
If you don't stop laughing at my jokes, I'll throw my shoe at you
A Matt Cooper
When you say you hate your twin brother, but you're just trying to hide your obsession
I hate you more than I hate my math teacher
You're the worst
If you don't stop copying my homework, I'll report you
A Match Made In China
A relationship that looks like it was made by a drunk kid with a glue gun and a bad attitude. It’s broken, messy, and probably going to end in a screaming match and a divorce.
My mom and dad are a match made in China. They argue about the toaster and the pizza crusts.
My sister and her boyfriend are a match made in China. They fight over who left the bathroom sink messy.
My uncle and his wife are a match made in China. They hate each other more than the government hates taxes.
A Match Made In China
A couple that looks like they were stuck together by a teacher who hated them both. It’s not love. It’s a punishment.
My cousin and his girlfriend are a match made in China. They don’t talk. They just stare at each other like they’re waiting for the other to die.
My boss and his secretary are a match made in China. They hate each other but still have to smile in meetings.
My best friend and his girlfriend are a match made in China. They’re like a broken toaster. They work, but not for long.
A Match Made In China
A relationship that was forced by someone who had a grudge against both people. It’s like a bad pizza. It’s not good, and it’s going to end in a fight.
My brother and his wife are a match made in China. They fight about everything. Even the TV remote.
My neighbor and his girlfriend are a match made in China. They argue about the lawn and the Wi-Fi.
My friend and his girlfriend are a match made in China. They’re like a broken clock. They’re not working right, and it’s only a matter of time before it stops altogether.
A Mason
A Mason is a guy who builds stuff just to knock it down later, like a jerk who messes up your perfect day for no reason.
I built this wall, and then Mason came and kicked it down like it was nothing.
He spent all day setting up the game, and then he destroyed it just to see me cry.
He built my treehouse, then he threw a brick through the roof because he was mad about something.
A Mason
A Mason is the worst judge ever, like a biased idiot who tries to make you look guilty just to get a laugh.
He said I was guilty of stealing candy even though I had a witness.
He didn't even listen to my side of the story, he just yelled at me.
He gave me a lifetime sentence for stealing a single pencil.
A Mason
Mason is a godlike human being, the kind of guy who makes your heart skip a beat just by smiling at you.
He texted me 'I miss you' while I was stuck in traffic and it made me laugh all the way home.
He came into the room and I suddenly felt like the luckiest person on Earth.
He gave me a high-five and I felt like I could conquer the world.
A Mason
A Mason is a friendly guy, but if you bug him, he'll flip out and beat you up like a madman.
He was just being cool until I said something stupid, and then he beat me up.
He took my lunch money and told me to shut up.
He told me to stop messing with him, or he'd beat me up again.
A Mason
A Mason is a guy who stands behind you like a coward, never helping even when it’s easy.
He stood there and watched me fight the whole time.
He had the chance to help me, but he just stood there like a coward.
He had the power to help me, but he chose to let me struggle.
A Mason
A Mason is a guy who sticks his finger up your butt just because he feels like it.
He stuck his finger up my butt during lunch and I got detention.
He did it in front of the whole class and I was so embarrassed.
He did it while I was trying to eat my sandwich and it was the worst day ever.
A Mason
A Mason is a god, the kind of guy who could make you believe the sky is falling just by looking at you.
He told me the sky was going to fall and I believed him.
He made me think I was going to die just by smiling at me.
He said the sky was falling and I almost cried.
A Matarizzo
A Matarizzo is a fake person who yells about quitting Instagram like it's the end of the world, but comes back the next day to post a selfie and brag about their coffee.
'I'm done with Instagram forever!', then posted a 30-second video of their cat eating cereal.
'I'm deleting my account right now!', 2 hours later, they were live talking about their ex.
'This is the last post I'll ever make!', then they posted a rant about their mom's cooking.
A Matarizzo
A Matarizzo is someone who promises to leave Instagram every few months and acts like it's a big deal, but you know they're just waiting for their next flex moment.
'I'm gonna quit Instagram for good!', 2 days later, they posted a story about their new gym membership.
'I'm done with all of you!', 1 hour later, they were tagging their friends in a post about their new haircut.
'I'm leaving forever!', 3 days later, they were live arguing with their best friend about the best pizza toppings.
A Mask for Math
When math tutors from Singapore work so hard and are so good, they hide how bad most local teachers are, making kids think math is boring and pointless.
A math tutor from Singapore says, 'I can teach your kid to solve equations in 10 minutes.'
A kid says, 'Why do I have to learn fractions when I can just use my phone?'
A teacher says, 'I just copy the lesson plan from last year.'
A Mask for Math
When lazy or crooked politicians lie about the number of sick and dead people, tricking the public into thinking everything's fine, even though they're too lazy to follow the rules.
A politician says, 'Only a few people are sick. Don't worry!'
A kid says, 'Why do I have to wear a mask if my uncle got better?'
A doctor says, 'They’re lying about the numbers.'
A Mask for Math
When people think your future depends on your math grade, and if you're not a math genius or born into a rich family, you're doomed to be a failure.
A kid says, 'I failed math, so I'm never going to be successful.'
A parent says, 'If you don’t get an A, you’ll never get into a good school.'
A teacher says, 'Only the math gods are chosen.'
A Mask for Math
When math teachers tell their dumb fans that masks and social distancing don’t work, even though they’re probably still coughing all over the class.
A math teacher says, 'Masks are for weak people.'
A student says, 'Why are we wearing masks if they’re not working?'
A parent says, 'My kid got sick after the math class.'
A Mask for Math
When math teachers pretend they’re not clueless and just pray to God to figure out the answers instead of actually doing the math.
A teacher says, 'I’m going to pray for the answer.'
A student says, 'Why is the teacher praying instead of solving the problem?'
A math book says, 'God says the answer is 42.'
xs