A Coons Age
A time so long ago it might as well be the stone age. Probably the worst kind of time ever.
I haven’t talked to my mom in a coons age
He hasn’t worked in a coons age
I haven’t seen that dog in a coons age
Discover Slang
A Coons Age
A raccoon can live up to 16 years if it’s lucky and not eaten by a grizzly. That’s a coons age. And you’re probably not lucky.
I’ve been waiting for that in a coons age
I haven’t updated my profile in a coons age
He’s been drunk for a coons age
A Coons Age
Any time that happened before now. It doesn’t matter how long it was. It’s a coons age, and that’s all that matters.
I haven’t updated this site in a coons age
He’s been sleeping in a coons age
I’ve been waiting for this in a coons age
A Cook Response
A reply so pointless it makes your brain hurt and your life worse.
Bro just told me he's gonna eat a whole pizza by himself. I said 'cool' and he said 'cool.'
I asked if we're going to the party and he said 'I guess.'
Told my mom I failed math and she said 'Okay.'
A Cook Response
A message so useless it’s like throwing a sandwich at a dog and expecting it to solve world hunger.
I asked where the keys were and he said 'I don’t know.'
I told her I was going to the store and she said 'Alright.'
I asked for advice and he said 'Maybe.'
A Cook Response
A reply that’s so empty it could be used to trap ghosts.
I said I was gonna pass the test and he said 'Cool.'
I told him my dog died and he said 'Okay.'
I asked for help and he said 'Maybe later.'
A Cook Response
A response that’s so bad it makes your brain want to quit.
I said I was going to fail and he said 'Alright.'
I told him I was going to sleep and he said 'Cool.'
I asked what time it was and he said 'I don’t know.'
A Cook Response
A reply that’s like a broken toaster, it does nothing and you’re just mad.
I asked if I could borrow his pencil and he said 'Maybe.'
I told him I was going to the gym and he said 'Okay.'
I said I was going to be late and he said 'Cool.'
A Cook Response
A response that’s so weak it could be used to wipe a baby’s butt.
I told him I was going to cry and he said 'Alright.'
I asked for a hug and he said 'Maybe later.'
I said I was going to fail and he said 'Okay.'
A Convo Bomb
A convo bomb is when you drop a goddamn truth or old hurt like a grenade in the middle of a chat, and it explodes so hard, the conversation dies instantly.
You say, 'I know you cheated on me, why did you think I wouldn't find out?'
You bring up the time they stole your lunch money in third grade.
You say, 'You never even called me when I broke my leg.'
A Convo Bomb
A convo bomb is like photobombing but with words. You walk in like you own the conversation, and you don't leave even when everyone is begging you to.
You start talking about your ex during a group chat about the movie.
You cut someone off mid-sentence to tell everyone about your dog's weird obsession with socks.
You say, 'You all are so boring, I could fall asleep listening to you.'
A Convo Bomb
A convo bomb is when you crash a conversation like a drunk man at a party, and you don't even know you're not supposed to be there.
You start telling everyone about your weird dream in the middle of a serious discussion.
You interrupt a friend's story to blab about your weird new job.
You say, 'I didn't even know you were talking about me!'
A Continental Breakfast at the US Mint
A messy, gross morning where a lady with cramps gets covered in poop and sucked off. It’s like eating a moldy waffle with a dirty penny.
My aunt had a continental breakfast at the US Mint and now she smells like a toilet and a donut shop.
My cousin said it was the worst thing he ever ate. He threw up in the parking lot.
I saw a guy try to eat it and he cried like a baby.
A Continental Breakfast at the US Mint
When a woman on her period gets fucked with poop and tongue. It’s like eating a soggy bagel with a dead rat and a coin.
My brother tried it and now he won’t eat anything that’s not a burger.
My mom said it was like a horror movie. She got a rash from it.
My teacher said it was the reason why she never got a raise.
A Continental Breakfast at the US Mint
A breakfast where a woman gets pooped on, licked, and cursed at. It’s like eating a rotten pancake with a fart and a penny.
My friend’s dog tried to eat it and ran away screaming.
My dad said it was the worst thing he ever saw. He still dreams about it.
My neighbor got it for a bet and now he smells like a gym sock.
A Conrad
A Conrad is like a tiny ruler that fits in your hand and is usually hidden under your bed because it’s used for weird stuff.
I found a Conrad under my brother’s bed. He’s not a Conrad, he’s a pervert.
My ruler is a Conrad. I use it for secret measurements.
Conrad is just a fancy name for a piece of wood that’s been used for too many bad decisions.
A Conrad
This is when you take your socked foot and grind it against your girlfriend’s snatch in a crowded mall like you’re doing a dance.
I did a Conrad in the mall and got a look from a guy who thought I was a weirdo.
She asked me to stop doing Conrads in the movie theater. I didn’t listen.
My friend did a Conrad on a bus. The whole bus smelled like regret.
A Conrad
A guy who acts like a timid mouse, but once you get to know him, he turns into a loud, rude, and amazing human being.
He was shy at first, then he turned into a loudmouth. Now I can’t stand him, but I love him.
I thought he was a nerd, but now he’s my best friend and he’s a total ass.
He was quiet, then he became my favorite person. Now he’s my favorite ass.
A Conrad
The sweetest guy who sounds like a dog and will forgive you even if you steal his lunch.
He’s a Newfie with a voice like a dog and a heart that’s bigger than your head.
He forgave me when I stole his pizza. That’s a real Conrad.
He sounds like a dog and is the most forgiving person I’ve ever met.
A Conrad
The guy who’s smart, tall, and cool enough to make your brain explode with happiness.
He’s tall, smart, and hotter than a fire. I wish I was him.
He’s like the sun and the ice. He’s awesome.
He can do anything, and he’s so cool he makes my brain go boom.