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A HUMAN SKIDMARK ON THE UNDERWEAR OF LIFE
A walking disaster who thinks they're the main character of a movie when they're really just the sidekick of a toilet.
He called his mom ‘the queen of the universe’ and it was the worst thing I’ve ever heard.
He tried to rap and it was like a cat had a seizure and sang it.
He tried to fix my computer and now I have three viruses and a bruise.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A HUMAN SKIDMARK ON THE UNDERWEAR OF LIFE
A person so bad they make the moon look like it’s having a bad day; the kind of person who brings out the worst in everyone around them.
He cried during a horror movie and it was like the movie was crying too.
He tried to cook and turned my kitchen into a war zone.
He told a joke and it was so bad it made the floor laugh.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A HUMAN SKIDMARK ON THE UNDERWEAR OF LIFE
A human disgrace who would make a dead fish blush; the kind of person who makes you question why you were born.
He tried to be funny and it was like a broken toaster trying to sing.
He told me his life story and it was longer than my patience.
He tried to dance and it was like watching a goat try to do the twist.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A HUMAN SKIDMARK ON THE UNDERWEAR OF LIFE
A piece of living garbage who thinks they’re the best thing since sliced bread; the kind of person who makes you want to throw them out with the trash.
He tried to be cool and it was like a pigeon wearing a crown.
He told a joke and it was so bad it made the sky frown.
He tried to be a leader and it was like a lost puppy trying to be a lion.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A HUGE PACKET OF CHICKEN NUGGETS
A loud shout from a hungry person who just saw a giant bag of chicken nuggets and wants it all right now.
I saw that bag and my mouth started screaming.
That bag looked like a promise from God.
I could eat that whole bag and still ask for seconds.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A HUGE PACKET OF CHICKEN NUGGETS
A magical bag of chicken nuggets that somehow fits into your hands and makes you forget your problems.
That bag is like a dream come true for my stomach.
I don't care if it's 2 a. m. I'm taking that bag.
I'm gonna eat so much I'll float away.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A HUGE PACKET OF CHICKEN NUGGETS
A bag of chicken nuggets so big it might cause a food fight between you and your best friend.
That bag is a war zone waiting to happen.
I bet my friend will try to steal my nuggets.
We're gonna need a bigger table for this.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Gym
a place where you try to beat people at Pokémon, but you’re still 12 and still lose every time
I beat 2 people at Pokémon yesterday, but they were still better than me.
My cousin went to the gym to beat people at Pokémon and got distracted by a girl.
I went to the gym and only beat one person at Pokémon. That’s a win, right?
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Gym
the only thing more embarrassing than showing up to the gym is showing up to Shane’s garage with no beer
I went to Shane’s garage and didn’t bring beer. That’s how I know I’m a failure.
Shane said I looked like I was going to a funeral instead of a party.
I showed up to Shane’s garage with only one beer. That’s not a beer, that’s a insult.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Gym
the place you go to get in shape, but end up eating a Big Mac because you’re too lazy to leave the McDonald’s across the street
I went to the gym and ended up eating a Big Mac because I was too lazy to walk across the street.
My friend went to the gym and came out with a Big Mac and a side of shame.
I told my wife I was going to the gym, but I ended up eating a Big Mac instead.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Gym
when you go to the gym, but you’re not doing anything except pretending you’re working out
I went to the gym and just stood there like I was doing something.
My friend went to the gym and did one rep of bench press and then left.
I told my wife I was going to the gym, but I just sat there on the bench.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Gym
a temple for people who don’t have a job or college, and just want to look cool while lifting weights
I go to the gym because I don’t have a job or college, and I want to look cool.
My friend goes to the gym just to look cool and not do any actual work.
The gym is my temple, and I’m the priest of man boobs.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Gym
a place where you go to get in shape, but mostly to look at hot girls while you do sets and reps
I go to the gym to look at hot girls and not do any actual work.
My friend goes to the gym just to look at hot girls and not do any work.
I told my wife I was going to the gym, but I was just looking at hot girls the whole time.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Gym
a place where people go to get in shape, but most of them are too lazy or too busy staring at hot people to actually work out
I go to the gym, but I’m too lazy to do anything except look at hot people.
My friend goes to the gym and just stares at hot people instead of working out.
I told my wife I was going to the gym, but I was too busy looking at hot people to actually work out.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Guys Thing
A guy thing is something men think is normal, but women think is stupid or annoying.
Why do you need a ladder to change a lightbulb? It’s a guy thing.
Putting your shoes on the bed? Classic guy thing.
He spent 20 minutes fixing a leak. It’s a guy thing.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Guys Thing
When a guy says you look fine even though you look like a disaster.
You came out of the bathroom in pajamas. He said you looked fine. I called him out.
You wore socks with sandals. He said it looked good. I called him out.
You ate a whole pizza for breakfast. He said you looked fine. I called him out.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Guys Thing
Something only guys do or understand. It’s not for women.
Watching football on a Saturday? That’s a guy thing.
Putting your socks in the laundry? That’s a guy thing.
Putting your hands in your pockets even when it’s cold? That’s a guy thing.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Guys Thing
To jerk off, or to satisfy yourself with your own hand.
He took a 10-minute break to jerk off. I asked him why he was so tired.
She caught him jerking off in the bathroom. He was so embarrassed.
He got kicked out of class for jerking off. Classic.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Guys Thing
A guy thing that looks like a banana and is used to cover up something important.
He put on a banana and said it was a guy thing. I called him out.
He had three bananas on him. I asked why he had so many.
He tried to use a banana as a glove. I called him out.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
A Guys Thing
A yellow thing that goes on your junk and is used to avoid getting caught.
He put on a yellow thing and said it was a guy thing. I called him out.
He used a yellow thing to cover up his mistake. I asked why he had it.
He tried to use a yellow thing as a hat. I called him out.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
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