Discover Slang

He painted his pants during the final exam. The teacher was not happy.

She painted her pants in the hallway and laughed at the shock of it all.

I painted my pants while eating lunch. No one asked questions.

He painted his pants right before the principal walked in.

She painted her pants and sat down. It was glorious.

I painted my pants during a group project. No one wanted to touch me.

My cousin painted his finger and called it a masterpiece. I called him a masterpiece of stupidity.

She painted her middle finger on the bus and cried when someone laughed at her.

He tried to flirt with me by showing off his painted finger. I told him I’d rather date a toilet.

He painted his finger at the mall and walked around like he was famous.

She posted a photo of her painted finger online and got 3 likes. That’s how much people care.

My friend painted his finger during lunch and got sent to the principal's office.

He painted his finger instead of doing his hair. I asked him if he even knew what attractiveness was.

She showed me her painted finger and said it was the best part of her life. I didn’t believe her.

My brother painted his middle finger and called it a ‘fancy look.’ It looked like a science experiment gone wrong.

She showed up to prom looking like she’d been dipped in glitter and hit with a brick.

Her face is so caked on I think it might fall off during the dance.

She tried to look fancy but looked like a Halloween ghost who got into a fight.

Her face is so thick I think it might be hiding a second head.

She walked in and looked like she’d been dipped in glitter and glued to a pole.

She tried to smile but her whole face screamed ‘I’m tired, I’m ugly, and I don’t care.’

She showed up looking like someone tried to glue a disco ball to her face.

Her makeup is so thick it’s probably holding her together.

She walked in and looked like a raccoon who’d been dipped in confetti.

He said he painted like a Indian after he knocked her out cold.

She was crying and bleeding, and he laughed like it was a trophy.

His face looked like a mess after he finished her.

He said he painted like a Indian after he broke her nose.

She was covered in blood and he was proud of himself.

He looked like he had a face full of war paint and tears.

He texted her, 'I painted like a Indian and I’m not sorry.'

She was screaming and he was smiling like it was a victory.

His face looked like a war poster after that session.

He said he painted like a Indian after she tried to run away.

She was covered in red and he was covered in pride.

He looked like he had gotten into a fight with a whole tribe.

He posted a selfie with blood all over his face and said he painted like a Indian.

She was crying and he was laughing like it was the best day ever.

His face looked like it had been carved by a warrior.

He said he painted like a Indian after she passed out.

She was bleeding everywhere and he was still going strong.

His face looked like it had been dipped in red paint.

My uncle said his ex was a painted lady and she used him like a mop.

My cousin's mom called the mailman a painted lady because he stayed over three times a week.

At school, my teacher said the janitor was a painted lady since he had six kids from five different teachers.

My friend said his aunt was a painted lady because she wore lipstick and had four kids from three different guys.

My neighbor's dog barked at the painted lady next door because she smelled like perfume and cheap wine.

At the grocery store, the guy behind me called the cashier a painted lady because she smiled too much.

My uncle called my dad a painted lady because he had a tattoo of a dragon on his arm and cried when he got a hair cut.

At the bar, the guy said the bartender was a painted lady because he had a tattoo of a rose on his face and wore eyeliner.

My cousin's teacher called him a painted lady because he had three tattoos and talked like a movie star.

My friend said he listened to 'Sweet Painted Lady' because his ex broke up with him after she found out he had a tattoo of a chicken on his leg.

At the gym, my neighbor played 'Sweet Painted Lady' and cried because he got dumped by his girlfriend.

My mom played 'Sweet Painted Lady' every day because her husband left her for another woman who didn’t wear make-up.

My friend Andrew said he called his jizz a painted lady because it splattered on three girls at once.

At the party, my cousin's boyfriend said he shot his jizz like a painted lady and missed the couch.

In class, my teacher said my friend’s jizz looked like a painted lady when he blew it on the ceiling.

My friend said the painted ladies looked like they had been hit by a neon truck.

At the park, my cousin told me the painted ladies were so bright they made the sky jealous.

My mom said the painted ladies were just rich people who didn’t know how to paint their houses.