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painted whore
Makeup that sluts wear to look good, like they’re trying to win a beauty pageant with a face full of lies.
'She’s got more makeup on than my mom has jewelry.'
'That girl looks like she tried to paint her face and failed at it.'
'Her makeup is so bad, I think she was wearing a mask for the whole party.'
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted whore
A woman who wears so much makeup, her face looks like it came from a clown’s closet and charges people to look at it.
'That girl looks like she was born in a makeup store.'
'She has more layers of makeup than my grandma has layers of lies.'
'Her face is like a painting that someone threw glitter at and called it art.'
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted turtle
the turtles that look like they got beat up by a crayon box, but still the most legendary ones.
Just saw a painted turtle and it was like watching a crayon fight a pencil.
My friend tried to draw one and cried because it looked like a disaster.
That turtle got painted so bad it’s famous now.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted turtle
turtles that look like they were dipped in glitter and then cursed by a rainbow.
I saw a painted turtle and it was like the universe exploded in color.
My dog tried to eat one and got glitter everywhere.
That turtle is so colorful, it’s probably magical.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted turtle
the turtles that look like they were kicked out of a paint store and never came back.
That painted turtle was so messy, I thought it was covered in poop.
My teacher drew one on the board and it looked like a mess.
They painted that turtle so bad, it got its own Twitter.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted the moon
creaming someone's backside while they're almost done pooping their pants from being so close to coming.
He painted the moon right as she was about to scream from the pleasure.
She couldn’t believe he did that just before she hit her climax.
He pulled out and blasted her arse like it was a canvas.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted the moon
slapping someone's butt with cum right when they're about to lose control.
He painted the moon just as she was about to yell from the feels.
She couldn’t handle it, cum on her backside when she was so close to blowing her mind.
He nailed her ass when she thought she’d already finished.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted the moon
sploshing cum on someone's butt just before they lose their mind from pleasure.
He painted the moon right when she was about to scream her head off.
She couldn’t believe he did that when she was already halfway there.
He dumped his load on her arse like it was a masterpiece.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted rust
when they give a broken bridge a shiny new coat of paint instead of fixing it because the city is too broke to do anything smart
The mayor said it looked like a brand-new bridge. I said it looked like a dead fish.
They painted the rusted-out train tracks and called it progress. Progress is just fancy words for stupid stuff.
I asked why we didn’t fix the tunnel, and they said, 'Why spend money when you can spend it on paint?'
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted rust
when a city takes a leaking pipe and dabs it with glitter instead of replacing it because that’s how broke they are
They painted the rusted-out subway car like it was a birthday party. It looked like someone threw up confetti.
The highway had holes in it, but they painted over it and called it 'fancy road work.'
I asked why we didn’t fix the roof, and they said, 'We don’t have money, just paint.'
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted rust
when instead of fixing a rusty old thing, you cover it in paint because that’s cheaper than thinking
They painted the broken down street like it was brand new. It looked like someone tried to make it look good but failed.
The school took the rusted-out bus and gave it a coat of paint. It now looks like it's about to fall apart in three days.
The city painted the crumbling wall, and I said, 'It’s not going to hold up forever.' They said, 'We’ll worry about that later.'
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted rim
When you sprayload someone’s butthole and call it art
I painted the rim so hard I got a standing ovation from my toilet.
He said he was gonna paint the rim, then he did it twice.
She painted the rim during lunch and got suspended for being too loud.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted rim
When you dump your cum in someone’s butthole like a messy artist
I painted the rim and my friend cried because it was so good.
He painted the rim during a Zoom meeting and no one knew what was happening.
She painted the rim on her boyfriend and he still loves her.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted rim
When you make someone’s butthole look like a canvas with your cum
I painted the rim and now my pants are stained forever.
He painted the rim in the middle of a group project and everyone failed.
She painted the rim while doing her homework and got an A+.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted my squirrel
To spot every single dumb problem in your life like you’re the god of chaos and misery.
Man, my boss painted my squirrel. He’s got a problem with my coffee and his hair.
She painted my squirrel because her ex broke up with her and now she’s mad at me.
I painted my squirrel on Monday. Now I’m stuck in meetings until Friday.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted my squirrel
To yell at life like it owes you money and your problems are personal.
My kid painted my squirrel. He’s got a problem with math and his video game stats.
I painted my squirrel because the internet hates me and I’m tired of it.
She painted my squirrel on Tuesday, and now she won’t stop talking about her cat.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted my squirrel
To make problems look like they’re your personal enemies and you’re going to beat them up.
He painted my squirrel because his dog ate his shoes and now he’s mad at me.
My coworker painted my squirrel. She thinks her coffee is better than mine, and she’s right.
I painted my squirrel because my phone died and I had to talk to my mom.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted my squirrel
To look at life like it just gave you a bad haircut and you’re not happy about it.
My friend painted my squirrel. She’s got problems with her job and my taste in music.
I painted my squirrel because I lost my keys and now I’m late for work.
He painted my squirrel because his boss yelled at him and he took it out on me.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted my squirrel
To notice every little thing that’s wrong with your life like you’re the king of misery.
She painted my squirrel because her cat knocked over her coffee and now she’s mad at me.
I painted my squirrel on Friday. Now I’m stuck with a weekend full of problems.
He painted my squirrel because his dog barked at him and he took it out on me.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
painted my pants
When you let your pee go right into your pants like a leaky hose
I painted my pants during math class because I couldn't hold it anymore.
He painted his pants in front of the whole bus. It was legendary.
She painted her pants while yelling at her mom. Classic.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
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