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A Mitch and T
a human who is so lazy they could sleep through a zombie apocalypse and still be too tired to move
I didn’t even get out of bed today. I’m a legend.
I slept through my alarm, my mom, and my dog.
He said he was too tired to blink. I believe him.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mitch
A total piece of garbage. The kind of person who makes everyone else look good just by being around. He always yells, 'Shut up, fag,' like it's his job.
'Shut up, fag!' he screamed at the kid who tripped over his own feet.
He called me a fag in front of my mom. Classic Mitch behavior.
He yelled 'Shut up, fag' at the dog. The dog cried.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mitch
When you try to make a putt in disc golf and mess it up by hitting the top band of the basket. You’re so close, but you still miss.
He missed the putt by hitting the top band. Classic Mitch move.
He was so close to winning, but he hit the top band. A real Mitch.
He didn’t even try to make the shot. Just hit the top band. A total Mitch.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mitch
A guy who acts like a girl. He’s the boy version of a bitch. He’s always trying to be the center of attention.
He cried when he lost. A real Mitch.
He started a fight over a snack. A total Mitch.
He said he was going to be a star. A Mitch through and through.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mitch
A guy who dates so many girls that he doesn’t care anymore. He’s too busy being a cocky bastard to notice he’s been rejected by everyone.
He dates 10 girls a week. A Mitch through and through.
He didn’t even care when she broke up with him. He’s a total Mitch.
He was rejected by 5 girls in one day. Still a Mitch.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mitch
A guy who acts like a girl. According to Kevin Hart, it's the male version of a bitch.
He cried when he fell off the couch. A Mitch for sure.
He blamed his dog for his failure. A real Mitch.
He started a fight over a bag of chips. A total Mitch.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mitch
When you lose everything. Your phone. Your car. Your drink. You can’t find anything. It's like a nightmare where you're looking for your iPhone, your keys, and your dignity.
He lost his phone, his keys, and his dignity. A total Mitch moment.
He looked for his Tesla for an hour. A real Mitch.
He lost his $16 bottle of Rosé. Classic Mitch.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mitch
A guy who loves to get others in trouble just so he can be the center of attention. He’s the kind of guy who tattles on everyone.
He tattled on me for eating the last chip. A real Mitch.
He blamed his dog for breaking the lamp. A total Mitch.
He told the teacher about my sneaker. A classic Mitch.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Missile
A missile is like a confused kid who knows exactly where it isn't, but has no idea where it is. It subtracts stuff in its head until it gets where it needs to be, even if that place is totally made up.
My missile hit the moon and came back with a coupon for free tacos.
This missile took a wrong turn and ended up in my mom's closet.
The missile got lost and started a fight with a pizza delivery guy.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Missile
A missile is a smartass piece of tech that thinks it’s the boss. It knows where it isn’t, and it uses that to pretend it knows where it is, even if it’s just guessing.
This missile took out my neighbor’s cat and then took a nap.
My missile thought it was a laser pointer and started chasing a dog.
The missile got distracted by a donut and missed its target entirely.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Missile
A missile is another word for a big hard erection. It’s not just a missile, it’s a statement.
He said it was a missile, but I knew it was just a big one.
She sent a missile in the mail and got a thank-you note.
That guy walked in with a missile and the whole room gasped.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Missile
A missile is a soccer player who kicks the ball like it owes him money. He doesn’t think, he just hits it as hard as he can.
That kid kicked the ball like it was his last meal.
He missed the ball entirely and hit the coach instead.
He kicked the ball so hard it became a missile.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Missile
A missile is like a pair of giant breasts. It’s not just big, it’s legendary.
She walked in and the whole room became a missile.
That woman had a missile and it was a vibe.
The missile was so big it blocked the sun.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Missile
In Baltimore, a missile is a bag of raw heroin so good it could make you cry. If it’s good enough, it’s a missile. If it’s not, it’s just a regular bag of problems.
I got a missile and it felt like a hug from God.
That missile was so good, it made my dog high.
He said it was a missile, but I just got a headache.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Missile
A missile is something so good it’s like a five-star meal, a perfect sunset, and a million bucks all in one. It’s the best thing ever.
That pizza was a missile, I ate it and forgot my problems.
She was a missile and I got distracted.
That movie was so good it was a missile.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mirage
A mirage is a hot mess you think is hot from afar but when they get close you realize they’re just a sweaty, smelly mess who probably smells like old pizza and regret.
I thought that guy was a 10, turns out he’s a 2 with a bad haircut and a worse attitude.
She looked like a goddess from across the parking lot, but up close she was just a girl who hadn’t washed her socks in a month.
That guy looked like a model from 50 yards away, but when he walked up, I realized he was just a guy who hadn’t showered since 2017.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mirage
A mirage is a fake marriage you think is real because you’re high on love and hormones, but when the lights go out, you realize it was just a bunch of brain farts and bad decisions.
I married my ex because I thought we were soulmates, turns out we just had really bad communication and a shared love of pizza.
My brain told me I was in love, but my wallet told me I was being scammed.
I thought we were going to be together forever, but now I just have to pay alimony and my ex still texts me at 2 a. m.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mirage
A mirage is a guy with a fancy haircut, a cool shirt, and the ability to make you laugh until you cry, but he also fights in the outlands with a hologram like he’s trying to be the next big thing.
He walks in with a hologram and a smile, and I instantly fall for him.
He fights with a hologram like he’s trying to be the next big legend.
He makes jokes so good I forgot to breathe for 10 minutes.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mirage
A mirage is a character who uses decoys to escape, trick enemies, and basically make your life harder because he’s cool and you’re not.
He sends a decoy, and I get distracted by it while he sneaks up behind me.
He used a decoy to trick me into thinking he was dead, but he just cloaked and walked away.
He used his ultimate and I was left there, confused and slightly jealous.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
A Mirage
A mirage is a girl who’s all about the drama, puts on a show, and always gets hurt because she’s too soft to stand up for herself.
She cried when she fell off a cliff, but she still took the blame for the whole team.
She always says she’s tough, but the moment someone says something mean, she breaks down.
She fights for others, but she never fights for herself.
by Slangipedia 18d ago
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