Discover Slang

A Crusty Oliver
A guy who pees on a girl then reads the sacred text and f***s her with it until she flies away
He peed on me then read the sacred text and f***ed me in the gym.
She got peed on then read the sacred text and got f***ed in the school.
He peed on my friend then read the sacred text and f***ed her in the park.
A Crunch
A Crunch is when your guts go full war zone. It’s a poop so intense it feels like your body is trying to rip itself in half. People will literally forget their own names during a Crunch.
"I woke up at 3 AM because of a Crunch. I don’t even remember my own name right now."
My dog ran away because of my Crunch. That’s how loud it was.
I had a Crunch so strong, my neighbor asked if I was having a heart attack.
A Crunch
A Crunch is when you’re in the middle of a life-or-death situation and you’re the only one who can save the day, but you’re also the only one who’s still wearing pants.
"I had to Crunch through a wall to save my sister. I’m still wearing the same pants from 2012."
He Crunch-ed through the fire and saved the whole team. He didn’t even burn his eyebrows.
She Crunch-ed through the lava to save the kingdom. Her feet are still smoking.
A Crunch
A Crunch is when you do sit-ups, but you’re too lazy to actually do them right. You just bounce up and down like a sad, tired potato.
"I did a Crunch today. It took me 20 minutes to do 3 sit-ups."
My Crunch was so bad, my mom asked if I was in a trance.
I did a Crunch for 3 hours and still didn’t feel it.
A Crunch
A Crunch is when someone’s personality is so loud and obnoxious, it turns your whole group into a bunch of tired, confused zombies.
"My friend is a Crunch. Every time she speaks, I feel my brain shrinking."
He’s such a Crunch, I had to take a nap after talking to him.
That girl is a total Crunch. She’s like a scream in a classroom.
A Crunch
A Crunch is when you’re trying to flirt with someone so hard, you’re basically throwing your soul at them like a meatball at a pizza oven.
"I did a Crunch on my crush. I even said, ‘You’re my soulmate.’ Then I cried."
She did a Crunch so hard, the whole class turned around.
He did a Crunch on me and then asked for my number. I said no.
A Crunch
A Crunch is a fancy name for a bunch of people who like to wear weird clothes and do weird stuff in a weird place.
"I went to a Crunch and saw people wearing fishnets and doing the twist. It was weird."
My friend joined a Crunch and now he talks to rubber chickens.
I went to the Crunch and my face turned red from all the weirdness.
A Crunch
To Crunch is to poop so loud it sounds like a bulldozer is tearing through your intestines. It’s also when you’re so proud of your poop that you start doing math in your head.
"I Crunch-ed so loud, the whole street heard it. My neighbors called the police."
She Crunch-ed and did long division at the same time. It was impressive.
He Crunch-ed so hard, he broke a calculator.
A Crusty Garcia
A latino woman licks the dried poop crust from a man's butt that looks like it's been sitting there since the invention of the toilet. His name doesn't have to be Garcia, but it probably should be.
My aunt did this to my uncle after he skipped a week of bathroom breaks.
She did it in front of the whole family during Thanksgiving.
He didn’t even notice until she gave him a big kiss.
A Crusty Garcia
A latino woman uses a tostitos chip like a spoon to dig into a man's butt that smells like old tacos and regret.
She did it at the grocery store while he was picking out salsa.
He was too distracted by his phone to notice.
The chip came out with a chunk of something that wasn’t supposed to be there.
A Cruel Angel's Thesis
a song that makes you feel like you're on top of the world until you remember you're watching a show about robots crying in the middle of a nuclear apocalypse
"I felt amazing until I remembered Shinji was just a crybaby in a mecha."
My therapist said this song was my new favorite therapy.
I tried to listen to it during my lunch break and ended up crying in a vending machine."
A Cruel Angel's Thesis
the only thing that could make you feel better after getting crushed by life and your ex at the same time
I listened to it while eating my third pizza and crying into my couch.
My dog started barking at the screen like it was the enemy.
I tried to sing it and my voice cracked like a poorly made mecha."
A Cruel Angel's Thesis
the soundtrack to your life when everything is going wrong and you're too tired to care
I played it on repeat while eating ramen and crying in my pajamas.
My roommate asked if I was having a mental breakdown.
I tried to explain it to my mom and she just said, 'You're weird.'"
A Cruel Angel's Thesis
the reason you're still alive after watching the worst anime ever made
I listened to it during my third failed relationship and my third failed attempt at being a mecha pilot.
My cat sat on my lap and stared at me like I was a lunatic.
I tried to dance to it and tripped over my own feet."
A Cruel Angel's Thesis
the only thing that could make you feel good after getting your heart broken by a robot and your ex at the same time
I played it while eating ice cream and crying into my sleeve.
My friend said it was the best thing I could do to feel better.
I tried to sing it and my voice sounded like a dying robot."
A Cruel Angel's Thesis
the reason you're still sane after watching the most emotional anime ever made
I listened to it while eating my first meal of the day and crying into my soup.
My brother asked if I was having a mental breakdown again.
I tried to dance to it and my feet felt like they were on fire."
A Crusade
A Crusade is when a bunch of holy freaks went on a holy war to get their sins forgiven or to prove how much they loved God. They also liked to kill people who didn’t believe the same way.
My uncle joined a Crusade just to get out of paying taxes.
She started a Crusade against all the bad coffee in the world.
He went on a Crusade to convert his entire family to his religion.
A Crusade
Crusaders were like the medieval version of a religious boy band. They fought for God, took over lands, and dressed like they were in a holy fashion show.
That guy started a Crusade just to get a better parking spot.
The Crusaders took over Jerusalem because it was the best place to have a picnic.
She joined the Crusaders just to get out of doing her homework.
A Crusade
A Crusade is like going on a holy killing spree to get rid of all the annoying people in the neighborhood, or the whole world.
He went on a Crusade to kill all the annoying people in his town.
The Crusade was a way to get rid of all the thots in the region.
She started a Crusade just to eliminate her entire family.
A Crusade
A Crusade is when someone keeps arguing about something even though no one cares and everyone has already agreed to ignore them.
He started a Crusade about the best pizza toppings in the world.
She argued for three hours about whether cereal was a breakfast food.
He kept going on about how the sky was blue even though it was clearly green.
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