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paintball game
when you have purple bruises from getting shot and you lie to your girlfriend by making your buddy blast you with paintballs so it looks like you got attacked by a mob
My buddy blasted me ten times so my girlfriend would think I was in a war.
I had six hickies and told her I got stabbed by a gang.
He shot me until I looked like a pinata that got hit by a bullet.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball game
you get all bruised up from paintball shots and you make your friend blast you so your girlfriend thinks you were in a fight with a monster
I got shot six times by my buddy to hide the fact I was beat up by a mob.
She thought I was in a battle, but it was just my friend blasting me.
He made me look like I had been attacked by a pack of wolves.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball game
you get purple marks from getting shot and you let your buddy blast you to make your girlfriend think you got beat up by a gang
I had five hickies and told her I was in a street fight.
My friend blasted me with paintballs so it looked like I got attacked by a bunch of thugs.
She thought I got hit by ten guys, but it was just my buddy shooting me.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball God
Some guy named Ray Darkness who thinks he's the man, but is just lucky the balls didn't hit him in the face.
Ray Darkness said he'd take on the whole team by himself. He got shot three times and still ran out of the arena like a coward.
He took a mask off mid-game and screamed at a kid for breathing too loud.
His marker broke during a match, and he called it 'a divine sign from the Paintball Gods.'
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball God
A paintball wizard who knows every secret trick in the book but still can't handle Ray Darkness.
He spent hours teaching kids how to aim, only for Ray Darkness to walk in and make it look easy.
He had a perfect game until Ray Darkness showed up and ruined it with one shot.
He explained the entire history of paintball markers, then got beaten by Ray Darkness in 10 seconds.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball God
Rich Telford or Alex Fraige or Matty Marshall, three guys who know how to win and don't care if you're mad about it.
Rich Telford showed up, dropped a marker on the ground, and still won.
Alex Fraige walked into a game with zero markers and still made everyone cry.
Matty Marshall took a hit that should've killed him, then won the match in 15 seconds.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball God
A paintball legend who doesn't know what losing feels like and thinks he's invincible.
He ran into a wall, got painted three times, and still won the match.
He didn’t even look at his marker and still destroyed everyone in sight.
He told a kid to shut up during a match, then lost because of it.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball God
A paintball beast who plays so hard he makes your brain hurt from watching him.
He ran the entire arena in under 2 minutes and still had energy left.
He shot someone with his eyes closed and then laughed at them for being scared.
He had no idea how good he was, but everyone else knew.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintball God
Ray Darkness, because he's the only one who thinks he's a real Paintball God and probably is.
He walked in like he owned the place, got shot three times, then screamed at the sky.
He started a match with no mask on and still won.
He took out five people at once with one shot and called it 'the divine power of paint.'
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintard
A person who hauls an entire can of paint up a ladder like it's their life, then trips on nothing and dumps the whole mess over the door, wall, and sidewalk.
I saw my cousin drop a gallon of blue paint on the front steps. Now the neighbors think we’re having a tantrum.
He tried to look cool while climbing the ladder, but then he slipped and painted the street like a kid with a crayon.
My dad did this last weekend. He turned our porch into a rainbow disaster.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintard
Somebody who brings a whole tin of paint up a ladder, then loses their balance and douses the front door, wall, and sidewalk in color.
My uncle did this on my birthday. Now our house looks like it was attacked by a rainbow.
She painted half the sidewalk while trying to look tough.
He spilled red paint over the mailbox. Now it’s like a crime scene.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintard
A fool who drags a full can of paint up a ladder, then slips and dumps it all on the door, wall, and sidewalk.
My brother did this and now our front yard looks like a kid’s art project.
He tried to be cool, but the paint went everywhere. Now he's stuck with the mess.
She spilled yellow paint on the steps, and now it's like the sun decided to live there.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintaholic
a person who can't stop sniffing paint like it's the last meal on Earth
I inhaled that paint so hard, my nose turned purple.
He sniffed the whole can and then threw up on the floor.
She was painting the ceiling and forgot to breathe for 10 minutes.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintaholic
someone who thinks paint is a drug and they’re the dealer
That paint is my lunch. I don’t need food.
I bought three cans just to sniff them all day.
He tried to sell me paint like it was crack.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintaholic
a person who would rather inhale paint than kiss their mom
I’d breathe in that paint before I’d hug my sister.
He sniffed the paint and ignored his girlfriend’s birthday party.
She skipped dinner to sniff a can of blue paint.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintaholic
a human who turns into a sniffer whenever they see a paint can
That paint can came out, and I became a sniffer robot.
He saw the paint and started sniffing like it was his job.
She turned into a sniffing machine right in front of me.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintaholic
someone who can’t live without sniffing paint every single day
I didn’t wake up until I sniffed the paint at 7 a. m.
He lives in a house full of paint cans and nothing else.
She sniffed paint before she brushed her teeth.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintaholic
a person who would steal paint just to sniff it
I stole that paint because I needed a fix.
He broke into the store just for one can of red paint.
She took the whole container and ran away like a thief.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintacologist
A guy who came from a poor country thinking he'd meet a doctor but now he's just a messy painter who doesn't know his ass from a hole in the wall.
I moved here to be a surgeon, now I'm stuck painting my dog's face and calling it art.
Thought I was going to fix people, now I’m fixing my own mess with glitter and bad decisions.
Left my country for a doctor, ended up with a paintbrush and a lot of rage.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
paintacologist
A person who left his home country to find a surgeon but instead got stuck painting like he had no brain and no self-respect.
I came for medical help, now I’m just covering my walls with spaghetti and calling it modern art.
Was supposed to heal people, now I’m just making them laugh at my mess.
He left the hospital for a paintbrush and now he's stuck in a studio with no life.
by Slangipedia 8d ago
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