Oblication

My cousin texted me 10 times a day about her new dog. I had to fly to Ohio for 3 days. It was like a prison break, but with more people.

My mom said, ‘You can’t miss my 50th birthday’ like it was a mandatory meeting at work.

I took 2 weeks off, and 3 of them were spent with my in-laws. I came back more tired than a man who ran a marathon in a garbage bag.

I went to visit my sister. She asked me to pick up her dog, fold her laundry, and do a 10-minute workout with her. I came back looking like I had been to war.

My uncle said, ‘You can’t leave until you help me move.’ That was supposed to be my vacation.

I told my brother I was going on a trip. He said, ‘You’re not going anywhere until you help me clean my garage.’

I stayed with my parents for a week. They gave me a list of chores, a schedule, and a reminder that I was still technically a kid.

My aunt told me, ‘You’re not leaving until you help me paint the house.’ I painted the house. I did not leave.

I went on vacation with my cousins. They thought it was a party. I thought it was a survival mission.

My brother asked me to come visit for a weekend. I had to take time off work. He stayed for 3 days and left a mess.

My mom called me and said, ‘You have to come visit me. I’m lonely.’ I came. I didn’t leave until I felt like I was going to die.

I had a 5-day vacation. I spent 4 of them with my in-laws. I came back with a migraine and a new hatred for my wife.

I took a vacation to Florida. I worked the whole time. When I got back, my boss asked, ‘How was your vacation?’ I said, ‘I had to work 10 hours a day and I got sunburned.’

I went to visit my sister. She had me work at her store the whole time. I came back more tired than a man who ran a marathon in a garbage bag.

I went on a vacation and still got 10 emails from my boss. I came back like I had never left.

I told my boss I was going on a vacation. I got to my mom’s house and realized I had to stay the whole week. I had no idea what vacation meant.

I took a vacation to see my cousins. They had 40 relatives there. I left looking like I had been through a war.

I took a 3-day trip. I spent 2 of them with my sister. I came back with a new hatred for her and a sore back.

I went on a vacation with my parents. They talked for 12 hours straight. I came back with a headache and a new life plan.

My brother asked me to visit him for a week. He had 5 kids. I came back looking like I had been to war.

I told my boss I was going on a vacation. I got to my aunt’s house and realized I had to stay 4 days. I came back with a new hatred for family.