I'm chargin'

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When someone roasts you for being a sexless slug, you yell this like it's a superpower. It’s basically your last-ditch effort to save your dignity.

"You haven’t had a date since the ‘90s!" "I’m chargin’!"

"You’re like a dead battery!" "I’m chargin’!" (said while eating a sandwich)

"You’re a legend in the making!" "No, I’m chargin’!"

This is what you say when you’re too lazy to explain why you’re single. It’s basically a lie told to your friends while you’re still in pajamas.

"Why are you still single?" "I’m chargin’!"

"You’re not even trying!" "I’m chargin’!" (said from the couch)

"You’re a ghost!" "I’m chargin’!" (said with a mouth full of cereal)

You say this like it’s a battle cry when people mock you for not being active. It’s the verbal equivalent of putting on a cape and running away.

"You haven’t been out in weeks!" "I’m chargin’!"

"You’re a legend in the making!" "No, I’m chargin’!" (said while hiding under a blanket)

"You’re a legend in the making!" "No, I’m chargin’!" (said while eating a bag of chips)

This is your go-to excuse when people laugh at you for not having a love life. It’s like saying you’re still in the middle of a marathon.

"Why are you still single?" "I’m chargin’!" (said with a mouth full of pizza)

"You’re a legend in the making!" "No, I’m chargin’!" (said from the kitchen)

"You’re like a dead battery!" "I’m chargin’!" (said while wearing socks as gloves)

You yell this when people tease you for not being busy enough. It’s your last hope before you admit you’re a failure.

"You haven’t even kissed anyone!" "I’m chargin’!" (said while wearing pajamas)

"You’re a legend in the making!" "No, I’m chargin’!" (said while eating a sandwich)

"You’re like a dead battery!" "I’m chargin’!" (said from the couch)

This is the phrase you use when you’re too lazy to fight back. It’s basically your way of saying, “I’m still cool, okay?”

"You’re a legend in the making!" "No, I’m chargin’!" (said while eating chips)

"You haven’t been out in weeks!" "I’m chargin’!" (said from the couch)

"You’re like a dead battery!" "I’m chargin’!" (said while wearing socks)