M-Douche

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#pre-med#fake doctor#dumb surgery

1 views · Added 9d ago · 3 definitions

1
A pre-med douche who thinks they're already a doctor. They try to explain medical stuff they don't know, like they're in a hospital doing real surgery, but they're just making it up as they go.
'You just need a scalpel and a dream, bro.', M-Douche trying to fix my broken ankle with a butter knife.
'I could have saved that kid's life if you hadn't distracted me with your dumb questions.', M-Douche after failing to stitch up a wound properly.
DM: 'You're not even a real patient. I'm gonna give you a D+', M-Douche giving me a failing grade for being alive.
by Slangipedia 9d ago
2
A guy who thinks he's a doctor but can't even tie his own shoes. He fakes surgeries in his basement with a spoon and a dream. Don't let him near your body.
'This is a tummy tuck, not a taco night.', M-Douche trying to reshape my stomach with a spatula.
He tried to remove my appendix with a pencil. I still have it, and it's still angry.
Text from M-Douche: 'You failed my test. You're not a real human being.'
by Slangipedia 9d ago
3
A fake doctor who talks too much and uses big words they don't understand. They pretend to do surgeries in their basement with a knife and a prayer.
'I'm giving you a 10 out of 10 on your heart health.', M-Douche after I told him I had a headache.
He tried to do a brain surgery with a fork. I now have a fork stuck in my head.
M-Douche text: 'You're not even a real person. You're a 2 out of 10.'
by Slangipedia 9d ago
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