Jack Bauer

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#tv-hero#random-facts#coffee-obsessed

3 views · Added 10d ago · 7 definitions

1
Jack Bauer is like Chuck Norris, but Chuck Norris would cry if he had to deal with terrorists, bad coffee, and a day job. He’s the new man with the Random Facts and the only person who can save the world while having a migraine.
"I just flatlined, then I came back to save the world. What’s your excuse?", @JackBauerFan123
"Jack Bauer didn’t need a coffee. He needed a nuclear bomb.", @CTU_Member45
"I tried to be like Jack Bauer. Now I just lie in bed and yell at my alarm clock.", @BauerIsMyHero
by Slangipedia 10d ago
2
Jack Bauer is the boss of a team that fights terrorists. He’s got a bad day every year. That’s not even counting the times he got shot, stabbed, or had a guy named Tony try to kill him.
"Jack Bauer’s bad day? That’s like my bad week.", @BauerIsMyBoss
"He’s the leader of CTU, and he’s got a bad day every year. I got a bad day every week.", @TerroristFanatic
"Jack Bauer’s boss? He’s the boss of bosses.", @CTU_Legend
by Slangipedia 10d ago
3
Jack Bauer is the reason why Middle Eastern men and Russian mercenaries are dying in droves. He’s like a god with a gun and a bad attitude.
"Jack Bauer killed my cousin. He didn’t even say sorry.", @MiddleEasternMan
"He’s the god of CTU and the terror of terrorists.", @Mercenary69
"I tried to be a mercenary. Then I saw Jack Bauer. Now I just run away.", @Mercenary_Loser
by Slangipedia 10d ago
4
Jack Bauer is a superhero who does impossible things. He saves the world while being dead, being alive, and being confused about his own life.
"Jack Bauer saved the world while being dead. I just saved my mom from getting run over by a bus.", @NormalPerson
"He’s like a god. But he’s got a job. And it’s not easy.", @CTU_Worker
"He does things that make superheroes look like kids playing with toys.", @BauerFanatic
by Slangipedia 10d ago
5
Jack Bauer is a cool guy who fights terrorists on TV. He works for CTU and has better hair than most action men. To pull a Jack Bauer is to save the world, or at least pretend you did.
"I pulled a Jack Bauer. I saved my dog from getting run over.", @BauerFan2020
"He’s got better hair than me. I’ve been trying to grow my hair for years and it still looks like a raccoon.", @ActionMan
"Jack Bauer saves the world. I save my pizza from getting cold.", @BauerIsCool
by Slangipedia 10d ago
6
To Jack Bauer is to save the world from war while being dead, then coming back to life just in time for a coffee break.
"I just Jack Bauer’d the world. Now I’m going to take a nap.", @BauerIsBack
"He saved the world, then had a coffee break. That’s not even fair.", @CTU_Worker
"I tried to Jack Bauer. Now I’m just late to work.", @NormalPerson
by Slangipedia 10d ago
7
Jack Bauer is the most awesome person to ever be on TV. He’s got a gun, a badge, and a hatred for terrorists that could rival the devil’s.
"Jack Bauer is the most awesome guy I’ve ever seen. I tried to be like him. Now I just wear a badge and yell at my neighbors.", @BauerFanatic
"He’s the most awesome guy on TV. I’m just the guy who tried to be like him.", @NormalPerson
"He’s on TV. I’m just on my phone. That’s not even fair.", @BauerIsAwesome
by Slangipedia 10d ago
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