H.H.A.

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3 views · Added 12d ago · 5 definitions

1
A hot hipster asshole is a guy who thinks he’s cool but is actually a total loser who smells like old socks and coffee.
He wore a beanie in July and called me a ‘basic human’
He tried to start a band called ‘The Unwashed’
He asked me if I knew what ‘vintage’ meant and I said, ‘No, but I know what stank means’
2
A hot hipster asshole is the kind of guy who thinks he’s the only one who knows what ‘authentic’ means but actually just copied it from a TikTok.
He posted a video of himself ‘vibing’ in a coffee shop and called it a ‘lifestyle’
He tried to explain why ‘y2k’ was better than ‘2025’
He called my mom ‘out of touch’ because she didn’t know what a ‘substack’ was
3
A hot hipster asshole is like a moldy cheese wheel, he thinks he’s fancy, but he’s just gross and annoying.
He walked into a store wearing a onesie and a scarf and said, ‘I’m just being myself’
He tried to explain ‘the vibe’ and I fell asleep
He bought a ‘limited edition’ cup of coffee for $20 and called it a ‘hustle’
4
A hot hipster asshole is a guy who thinks he’s a legend, but he’s just a guy who wears a bandana and doesn’t know how to tie his shoes.
He did a 10-minute dance to ‘Uptown Funk’ in the middle of a grocery store
He called me a ‘traditional human’ because I didn’t like ‘the new wave’
He tried to start a ‘vibe movement’ and it failed in 2 days
5
A hot hipster asshole is someone who thinks he’s a genius because he knows what ‘artisanal’ means but can’t spell it.
He said, ‘I’m an artisanal human’ and I said, ‘You’re just a human’
He tried to sell me a ‘handmade’ cup of coffee that was just regular coffee
He called my dog ‘a basic pet’ and it barked at him
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