Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

You're so hungry you could eat a donkey and so horny you'd rather fight a donkey.

I saw a burger and a guy at the same time. My brain exploded.

My stomach growled and my pants tightened at the same time. It was a disaster.

I was so H and H I tried to flirt with the pizza guy and asked for extra cheese.

2

You're high like a kite and so horny you'd try to seduce a statue.

I smoked three joints and tried to chat up the vending machine. It didn’t work.

I got high and tried to kiss my cat. He hissed and ran away.

I was so high and horny I tried to flirt with my mom’s friend. She looked at me like I was insane.

3

This cheap bourbon is so bad it tastes like regret and floor wax.

I drank H and H and my brain turned to mush.

This whiskey is so bad I could’ve used it to clean my shoes.

I drank H and H and now my stomach is screaming at me.

4

You’re so horny and so clueless you might as well be a lost puppy in a meat factory.

I’m so horny and lost I tried to ask my neighbor for directions and ended up flirting with him.

I’m so clueless and horny I tried to seduce a map.

I’m so lost and horny I tried to kiss my GPS. It didn’t work.

5

A headband so big it looks like it was made by a confused alien.

My headband is so big it looks like a hat for a giant.

I wore my headband and it looked like I was trying to start a war with flowers.

This headband is so big it could be a boat.

6

You’re so special you’re probably the reason the moon is out of alignment.

I saw the message in my backyard and I’m still confused. I think I’m special.

Why am I still here? I should’ve found that message by now.

I’m special, I saw the message, and now I’m screaming into the void.

7

You're so horny and high you'd try to flirt with a fire hydrant during a blackout.

I was high and horny and tried to kiss the fire hydrant. It didn’t work.

I got high and tried to flirt with my neighbor’s dog. He ran away.

I was so high and horny I tried to send a message to my ex via smoke signals.