factjamin

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A factjamin is when you lie so hard your face turns into a potato and your mom calls the cops.

My dog can do math. I swear. He added 2+2 and got 5. I told the teacher. She said I was high.

I told my friend I won the lottery. He believed me. Now he's crying in a taco bell.

I told my boss I was sick. I wasn’t. I was just eating pizza. He fired me. I ate more pizza.

A factjamin is when you say something stupid and expect everyone to believe it, even if it's clearly nonsense.

I told my class I can talk to ghosts. They believed me. Now they follow me everywhere.

I said I can run faster than a cheetah. I ran. I tripped. I got laughed at.

I told my girlfriend I was a billionaire. She said okay. Now she's my slave.

A factjamin is when you lie so much you forget what’s real and what’s fake.

I told my parents I got a perfect score on my test. I didn’t. I got a 42. I still said I got a 100.

I told my friend I was a superhero. I flew. I crashed into a wall. I still said I was a superhero.

I told my teacher I was sick. I wasn’t. I just wanted to skip class. I still got detention.

A factjamin is when you make up wild stuff and nobody calls you out, even if it's total trash.

I told my friends I can breathe underwater. I didn’t. I just held my breath. They believed me.

I said I can fight a dragon. I tried. I got bit. I still said I won.

I told my mom I was going to space. I just went to the store. She said I was a genius.

A factjamin is when you lie so much it becomes a religion, and people start praying to you.

I told my class I was a god. They believed me. Now they pray to me before tests.

I said I can bring people back from the dead. I didn’t. I just made up stories. Now people bring me flowers.

I told my friend I was the chosen one. He believed me. Now he follows me everywhere.