Ear Condom

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#annoyed#brick wall#walk out

7 views · Added 17d ago · 6 definitions

1
An ear condom is when you’re so mad at someone’s dumb talk that you pretend their words can’t touch you, like they’re talking to a brick wall, and you’re the wall.
My mom started nagging me about my grades, and I put on my ear condom so hard I almost fell over.
At work, my boss kept yelling at me, so I put on my ear condom and walked out.
My brother said I was the worst gamer ever, so I pulled out my ear condom and told him to go to hell.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
2
An ear condom is like a shield for your ears, so you don’t get hurt by the stupid things people say. It’s like having a bubble around your head that only lets good stuff in.
My friend kept making fun of my haircut, so I put on my ear condom and said, ‘I don’t need your stupid comments.’
At lunch, my teacher started ranting about the weather, so I put on my ear condom and took a nap.
My sister told me I was the worst cook ever, so I pulled out my ear condom and told her to shut up.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
3
If you hate Judas, you wear an ear condom, and that’s not just a metaphor, it’s a promise. You’re blocking out everything he says, and you don’t care if it hurts your ears.
My friend said Judas was the worst, so I pulled out my ear condom and said, ‘I believe you.’
My brother started singing Judas in the car, and I put on my ear condom and turned the music up.
At school, my teacher played Judas, and I pulled out my ear condom and told her to stop.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
4
An ear condom is like a condom, but for your ears, and it’s not just for fancy singers. It’s for anyone who wants to block out stupid noises or the dumbest opinions ever.
At the mall, my friend kept making fun of my shoes, so I pulled out my ear condom and told him to leave me alone.
My dad started telling me about his day at work, and I put on my ear condom and said, ‘Not today.’
My brother said I was the worst at video games, so I put on my ear condom and beat him.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
5
An ear condom is like a blanket for your ears, it keeps you safe from the dumb stuff people say. You don’t need to hear it, and you don’t want to.
My friend kept telling me I was ugly, so I put on my ear condom and said, ‘I don’t need to hear that.’
At school, my teacher started yelling about my homework, so I pulled out my ear condom and told her to stop.
My mom started nagging me about my grades again, and I put on my ear condom and said, ‘I’m done.’
by Slangipedia 14d ago
6
An ear condom is a fancy way to say ‘I don’t want to listen to your stupid opinions.’ You wear it like a cape, and it makes you feel like a superhero.
My friend kept telling me I was the worst at drawing, so I put on my ear condom and said, ‘I’m a superhero now.’
At lunch, my teacher started telling me about her cat, and I put on my ear condom and said, ‘I’m not listening.’
My brother started telling me I was the worst at video games, and I put on my ear condom and told him to shut up.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
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