D.U.A.F.F.

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The one who looks like they got hit by a noodle truck and still smells like last week's dumplings.

Why is D. U. A. F. F. wearing my old sock as a hat?

D. U. A. F. F. tried to run in the hallway and tripped over a bag of rice.

D. U. A. F. F. is the only one who can eat three bowls of pho and still be fat.

The guy who’s so ugly he could make a monster cry and still smells like a sweaty sock drawer.

D. U. A. F. F. came to the party and brought a whole family of ants with him.

D. U. A. F. F. tried to do a karate chop and it looked like he was trying to kill a pigeon.

D. U. A. F. F. ate a whole pizza and still had room for a bag of chips.

The friend who’s so fat he could take up an entire table and still smells like he hasn’t showered since the moon landed.

D. U. A. F. F. sat down and the chair broke because he’s that heavy.

D. U. A. F. F. tried to hug me and I almost got crushed.

D. U. A. F. F. eats so much he could start a food fight by himself.

The person who looks like they were dropped in a soup kitchen and never left.

D. U. A. F. F. walked in and the whole class started laughing because he looked like a soup can.

D. U. A. F. F. tried to do a dance and it looked like he was trying to escape a giant bowl of soup.

D. U. A. F. F. eats so much he could make a buffet cry.

The guy who’s so ugly he could scare a ghost and still smells like he bathed in stale rice.

D. U. A. F. F. walked in and the ghost ran away because he was that scary.

D. U. A. F. F. tried to sing and it sounded like he was trying to kill a frog.

D. U. A. F. F. eats so much he could feed an army and still be fat.