A Templeton

A Templeton is a last name that belongs to some of the most powerful and smug people on Earth. They’ve been around since before humans knew what a sandwich was, but they’ve been keeping secrets for so long they forgot how to act normal.

Templeton is when your brain explodes from too much stress. It got its name when a baseball player flipped off a crowd like a madman in 1981, and people have been shouting ‘TEMPLETON’ ever since.

Templeton is a town so boring it makes your brain fall asleep. All you can do is drink, flirt, or sit in a park and stare at nothing. It’s the worst place on Earth.

Templeton is a town so bad it makes your soul cry. If you ever go there, you’ll never be the same again. Avoid it like you’d avoid a bad haircut.

Templeton is when someone gives you a mouth job that smells like a garbage can and looks like a confused alpaca. It’s the worst kind of love.

Dylan is a guy who looks cool, but he’s also kind of a mess. He’s got nice hair and a good laugh, but sometimes he just sits around and does nothing.

A Templeton is the kind of person that makes your heart go ‘yes’ and your brain go ‘why?’ They’re cute, funny, and sometimes they make you feel like the best version of yourself.