octuary
An actuary who’s so smart they could figure out the odds of you getting a tattoo and still having time to judge you for it
My octuary said I’d get a tattoo. I did. He said it was stupid. It was.
He predicted my tattoo would be permanent. It was. He also predicted I’d regret it. I do.
My octuary said I’d get a tattoo of a flamingo. I did. He said I was a fool. I am.