ockief
An ockief is someone who listens to your problems like they are the most important thing in the world, even when they're just there to eat your snacks.
I told my ockief about my failed test and he said, 'You’ll pass, you’re my disaster.'
He listened to my problems and then ate my last snack.
He said my art was 'a masterpiece of disaster,' and then he took a bite of my snack.