obscurant

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A smelly, brainy know-it-all who hides facts like they’re dirty socks, just so you can’t understand anything they say.

My history teacher is an obscurant, he talks about ancient wars like they’re personal beefs.

My cousin is an obscurant, he hides all the answers so he can look smart.

My uncle is an obscurant, he hides his own money so he can pretend he’s rich.

So confusing it’s like trying to read a message written in mud and ketchup.

That math test was obscurant, it looked like a bad dream.

The instructions for the game were obscurant, they made no sense.

The map to the treasure was obscurant, it was a mess.

A word that hipsters throw around like it means something, but it really just means they’re trying to sound cool.

My friend used 'obscurant' in a sentence, he sounded like he just woke up from a nap.

My teacher said 'obscurant' in class, he looked like he was trying to impress the principal.

My neighbor used 'obscurant' in a conversation, he looked like he had a brain.

When someone fills your life with weird stuff just to show off how much they know and how little they care about normal people.

My brother is an obscurant, he talks about dead movies like they’re his friends.

My sister is an obscurant, she mentions old countries like they’re celebrities.

My mom is an obscurant, she quotes dead books like they’re hot.

So weird it’s like someone threw a party in your brain and no one showed up.

My dog is an obscurant, he barks at clouds like they’re enemies.

My cat is an obscurant, he hides in boxes like they’re secret bases.

My brother is an obscurant, he talks to plants like they’re his friends.

Something so obscure it’s like it was hidden in a cave and forgot to come out.

That song is an obscurant, it sounds like a ghost trying to sing.

That movie is an obscurant, it looks like it was made in the 1800s.

That book is an obscurant, it reads like a letter from a dead person.

So unimportant it’s like your birthday was just a side note in someone else’s story.

My birthday was an obscurant, it was just a Tuesday.

My friend’s birthday was an obscurant, it was like it never happened.

My mom’s birthday was an obscurant, it was lost in a sea of chores.