Oblituary

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1 views · Added 7d ago · 3 definitions

1
When you drink so much you might as well be dead and your friends are just waiting for the funeral.
I drank a whole keg and now I'm in the hospital. My obituary is being written by my barista.
After the party, my brother passed out on the couch and my mom called the cops. His obituary is coming soon.
I drank until my eyes turned blue. My obituary is already on the internet.
2
When you drink so much it feels like you're dying and your friends are just pretending they care.
I drank so much I threw up on my boss. My obituary is being written by my mom.
I drank until my dog left me. My obituary is going to be funny.
I drank until my phone died. My obituary is going to be on my phone.
3
When you drink so much you might as well be dead and your friends are just waiting for the party to end.
I drank so much I passed out in the park. My obituary is being written by my neighbor.
I drank until my pants fell off. My obituary is going to be a meme.
I drank so much I forgot my own name. My obituary is going to say I died from stupidity.
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