obasam

Fresh

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A sweaty, almost religious feeling women get when they see Barack Obama, like he’s about to give them a free tampon and a Nobel Prize.

I saw Obama on TV and my pants got soaked. What is this? A sauna? A holy place? A free tampon dispenser?

My mom screamed when Obama smiled. She said it was like the devil gave her a hug.

I was at the grocery store and Obama walked by. I dropped my milk. It was like the milk knew what was coming.

When a woman sees Barack Obama and it feels like he’s going to take her pants off and give her a speech at the same time.

I saw Obama at the park and my pants were gone. My dog was confused.

My sister started crying when Obama waved. She said it was like her ex came back to propose.

I was eating a taco when Obama walked by. I dropped it. Now I have taco tears and obasam.

A magical, almost embarrassing thing that happens to women when they see Barack Obama, like he’s going to give them a free hug and a bad haircut.

I saw Obama on the street and my hair fell out. I got a free hug and a free bald head.

My aunt screamed when Obama smiled. She said it was like her hair was on fire.

I was taking a shower and Obama walked by. I slipped and got obasam.

When a woman gets so excited by Barack Obama that she might pebble, spill coffee, and probably yell at her cat.

I saw Obama at the coffee shop and I pebbled. My coffee went everywhere.

My cousin started yelling at her cat when Obama waved. The cat was confused.

I was walking my dog and Obama walked by. I pebbled. My dog got coffee on his face.

A weird, almost magical experience where women feel like Barack Obama is about to give them a speech and a free pizza.

I saw Obama at the pizza shop and my mouth dropped. I got a free pizza and a free speech.

My mom pebbled when Obama smiled. She said it was like pizza heaven.

I was eating a sandwich when Obama walked by. I dropped it. Now I have sandwich tears and obasam.

When a woman sees Barack Obama and it’s like the universe is giving her a free hug, a free speech, and a free tampon.

I saw Obama at the gym and my tampon fell out. I got a free hug and a free speech.

My sister screamed when Obama waved. She said it was like the universe was giving her a free pizza.

I was taking a nap when Obama walked by. I pebbled. Now I have nap tears and obasam.