OATT
OATT is the kind of person who fakes being sick just to stay home. You're furious because you're stuck working and you wish they had the worst case of the flu ever.
'I have the flu. I have the flu from my neighbor's dog.'
'I called in sick because my brain is melting. My brain is melting from my boss's terrible decisions.'
'I'm not coming in because my soul is dead. My soul is dead from my job.'