Oatmeal Lesbian

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#yoga#felt bag#eco-friendly

2 views · Added 7d ago · 3 definitions

1
They do yoga but only if it’s on a mat they bought from a thrift store and they swear by it. They eat oatmeal like it’s their last meal and wear clothes that look like they were donated by a grandma who died in a coffee shop.
My yoga teacher is an oatmeal lesbian. She did downward dog in a felt bag and called it 'spiritual sustenance.'
I saw one at the gym. She was doing yoga in clogs and eating oatmeal from a Tupperware. I asked if she was a human or a cereal commercial.
My aunt is an oatmeal lesbian. She wears a felt bag to yoga and says it’s ‘eco-friendly’ and ‘aesthetic.’ I say it’s ‘disgusting’ and ‘a curse.’
by Slangipedia 7d ago
2
They’re like the cool kids of the health food world, but they’re too lazy to dress up for it. They eat oatmeal for every meal, wear clogs, and think a felt bag is the height of fashion.
My neighbor’s an oatmeal lesbian. She eats oatmeal for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I asked her why, and she said, 'It’s the only thing that doesn’t taste like regret.'
At the grocery store, I saw an oatmeal lesbian. She was buying clogs, a felt bag, and a bag of organic oats. I said, 'You’re gonna need a bigger mat.'
My cousin’s an oatmeal lesbian. She wore clogs to my wedding and said it was 'eco-conscious' and 'a lifestyle.' I said it was 'a disaster' and 'a snack.'
by Slangipedia 7d ago
3
They eat so much oatmeal they look like they’ve been drowned in it. They wear clogs, wear felt bags like they’re a fashion statement, and do yoga like it’s a religious experience.
My yoga class is full of oatmeal lesbians. One of them did a headstand in a felt bag and said it was 'a spiritual awakening.' I said it was 'a mental breakdown.'
I saw an oatmeal lesbian at the park. She was eating oatmeal from a felt bag and doing yoga in clogs. I asked if she was a human or a cereal ad.
My mom’s an oatmeal lesbian. She eats oatmeal for every meal and says it’s 'good for the soul.' I say it’s 'good for the stomach' and 'bad for the brain.'
by Slangipedia 7d ago
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