Oaksman

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2 views · Added 7d ago · 3 definitions

An Oaksman is a freakin’ beast who looks like a human but can lift mountains, run like a wild animal, and work out so hard it makes your brain hurt. They love each other more than pizza and are related to Owen Thomas, the original Oaksmen legend.

I saw an Oaksman bench press a car. I’m not even kidding. He grunted like a bear.

My cousin’s friend’s uncle is an Oaksman. He wears a hat so big it looks like a helmet for a giant.

They say the Oaksmen speak in grunts and flapping Lats. I think they’re just too lazy to talk properly.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

An Oaksman is a human who’s got the strength of a bull, the speed of a cheetah, and the workout routine of a madman. They’re all related to Owen Thomas, and they might as well be from another planet.

My gym teacher is an Oaksman. He does push-ups while eating a whole pizza.

I saw an Oaksman run a mile in under two minutes. I walked it and I’m not even out of shape.

They say the Oaksmen don’t talk. They just grunt and flap their Lats like they’re trying to communicate with aliens.

by Slangipedia 7d ago

An Oaksman is a human who can lift weights so heavy they make your bones cry, run so fast they leave you in the dust, and work out so hard it’s like they’re trying to kill themselves. They’re all related to Owen Thomas and they’re basically gods.

My neighbor is an Oaksman. He bench presses a cow and doesn’t even break a sweat.

At school, the Oaksmen ran around the track so fast, I got dizzy just watching them.

I think the Oaksmen speak a secret language. It’s just grunts and flapping Lats. That’s not a real language, that’s just being lazy.

by Slangipedia 7d ago