n.p.s.
A magical shield that stops your nipples from getting all raw and angry from the ocean’s wrath.
My N. P. S. is my lifeline. Without it, I’m just a sad guy with sore nipples.
I paid $200 for this board. If it doesn’t have N. P. S., I’m throwing it in the sea.
N. P. S. is the only thing keeping me from quitting surfing. And maybe my sanity.