naffbinder
A human version of a bad Wi-Fi connection; they can't keep it up, and they definitely can't keep it on.
She was a naffbinder. I felt like I was watching paint dry with a side of disappointment.
He tried to be romantic. It was like watching a cat try to do a backflip.
My boyfriend is a naffbinder. I now have a new hate for lukewarm coffee.