Maddie Lindell
Maddie Lindell is the type of person who could make a statue of a Dolan Twin weep. She’s got the kind of ass that claps so loud, it sounds like a fat kid jumping into a pool.
My mom saw Maddie Lindell on Instagram and said, 'That girl has the ass of a god, and I’m just a mortal with a gym membership.'
At the gym, Maddie Lindell walked in and the weights started talking to each other.
I asked Maddie Lindell for her number, and she said, 'You're lucky I didn't slap your ass cheeks for being so ugly.'