Madamel
A Madamel is a guy you can rely on, even when his friends are drunk and screaming. He’s tall, people think he’s a woman, and he eats like he’s got all day while you’re choking on your food.
My Madamel shows up at 3 AM with coffee and no filter.
He’s the only one who can calm my drunk uncle down.
He eats so slow, I’m done with my meal before he finishes his salad.