Madame Gourgeon
Madame Gourgeon is a cursed Danny Devito lookalike who thinks everyone worships them. They have no idea what cardio is and are too busy being a virgin to care about looks.
They told me I was their new disciple. I said 'nope, I'm still a sinner.'
They tried to start a cult in the grocery store. The manager threw them out.
They told their dog they were a disciple. The dog bit them.