Maasai jumping-jack
You bounce like a madman with your wiener tucked between your legs. It’s like a wank with no hands. People do it when they’re so frustrated they can’t even hold a phone.
My dad did it during a family dinner. My mom was so mad she threw a plate.
I did it during a video call. My coworkers thought I was having a panic attack.
My brother did it in the middle of a game. He got a red card.