M$ Meat Wallet
A Microsoft guy who pretends to help you, but they're just trying to get your money for their stupid ideas.
He told me my laptop was broken, but it was just my coffee. He still charged me $200.
He said he'd make my PC run faster, but now it's slower and I got a bill for $700.
He promised me my computer would be fixed in 10 minutes, but now it's broken and I got a bill for $1000.