L.B.F.F.E.
The kind of friend who thinks they're your best friend, but they’re just your worst enemy in disguise.
You: 'I’m going to college.' Them: 'I’m going to sleep.'
You get a scholarship. Them: 'I got a coupon.'
You: 'I’m rich.' Them: 'I’m still poor, but at least I got free pizza.'