Lag Fag
A man who suddenly realizes he’s gay after getting a job, a house, and two kids. He’s too embarrassed to come out, but he still wants to flirt with everyone.
Text: "I just came out to my wife and she said, ‘I knew it, but I’m still married to you.’"
DM: "I’m gay, but I’m not telling my kids because they already think I’m weird enough."
In chat: "I’m gay, but I’m still trying to act like I’m not. It’s exhausting."