Lackopussitis
When you haven't touched a pussy in so long, your brain turns to mush and you start seeing every drunk girl as your future wife. It's like being stuck in a sauna with a sad trombone.
DM: 'Hey, are you my soulmate?' 'No, I'm your ex's soulmate.'
Text: 'I just stared at a pizza for 10 minutes. It was a love language.'
Post: 'My brain is a broken toaster. I can't function.'