Lack of sex syndrome
When you're so broken from no sex that you start eating cereal for dinner and crying at the same time
'I had cereal for dinner and cried. My cat looked at me like I was a mess.'
'I ate a bowl of cereal and said, 'This is the best I can do right now.''
'I cried while eating cereal and my neighbor knocked on my door. He said, 'Are you okay? I heard you crying.'