labia bumpers
When a man thinks he's fancy but leaves a chunk of hair on his junk like it's a f***ing monument.
He thought he was a king, but his pubes looked like a f***ing island in the middle of the sea.
His buddy called him 'the hairy island' because he had a big patch above his weenie.
He tried to look cool but his pubes looked like they were from a different continent.