Jack Off Holiday Hour - It's your day off, kid. No work. No stress. Just sit there,

It's your day off, kid. No work. No stress. Just sit there, jerk it, and drink like it's your last day on Earth.

I'm not coming to work tomorrow. Jack Off Holiday Hour is real.

Why would I go to the store when I can just jack off and eat pizza?

I'm not even going to reply to my boss. He'll figure it out.