jack church
A guy so cool he’s stuck in Antarctica, wearing socks like they’re armor. He’s got the palest skin you’ve ever seen, and he’s got the nerve to be both black and white.
Jack Church once walked into a snowstorm and came out looking like a ghost.
He said my hair was 'not even close' to being cool, and he was right.
He eats penguins for lunch and calls it 'breakfast.'