I'm HIV positive, and allergic to latex.

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3 views · Added 11d ago · 3 definitions

1
It’s when someone is trying to flirt with you, but they’re basically a walking disaster with no hope of ever being good at anything.
My ex tried to text me, but I told him I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He didn’t get the hint.
She asked me out, but I said I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. She ran away screaming.
He hit on me at the bar, but I told him I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He left before the drink touched his lips.
2
It’s when someone thinks they’re hot stuff, but they’re just a mess with no chance of ever being cool.
My friend’s cousin hit on me, and I said I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He got so mad he spilled his coffee.
At the gym, some guy tried to chat me up. I told him I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He left before the dumbbell touched the floor.
My coworker asked me out. I said I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He now thinks I’m a witch.
3
It’s when someone thinks they’re the main event, but they’re just a joke with no shot at being taken seriously.
He texted me, said he was cute, and I told him I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He never texted me again.
At the party, some guy tried to make a move. I said I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He left before the music started.
My neighbor came over to say hi. I told him I’m HIV positive and allergic to latex. He now thinks I’m cursed.
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